Ten Years Later
by honeyandmustard
Summary: The year is 2023 and it's ten years after Brendan got arrested and, the police have been convinced to reopen the investigation... This time however, they find out that Brendan seems to always be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Kinda AU and will be STENDAN. I have rated as a T for now but this may increase the further through the story I get.
1. Why Now?

**Author Note**: This is a Stendan story... This is a story which has people in it who died or left a while ago, but I wanted them to be involved so they are still very much alive and existent in this story.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Ten years had passed since Stephen Hay lost the love of his life.

Ten years had passed since Stephen Hay lost the man who replaced the love of his life.

Eight years had passed since Stephen Hay got diagnosed with HIV.

Seven years had passed since Stephen Hay had gotten divorced by his second husband.

Five years had passed since Stephen Hay met the new love of his life, and those five years had been some of the best of Stephen Hay's life.

Ste was 28 when he had met Jed, a young and handsome doctor, at Chester Hospital were he was being treated for HIV. At the time of meeting Jed, Ste was still on a downward spiral and, if he was being honest about, he was about to hit rock bottom. His drug addiction had improved but, that was only because the stuff he was taking was interfering with the improvement of his health. Without the drugs, Ste ended up sinking into a depressive state and the medication for depression wasn't recommended, giving the circumstances.

It was a cold and bitter day when Ste arrived at the hospital to find out that his doctor wouldn't be available and he would have to see the new doctor, something he was none to happy about. Ste had become a private guy ever since he had gotten HIV and he had only ever told his doctor and Jon Paul as Jon Paul was the only person he had feared giving it to.

However, that first visit with the new doctor was the reason that, five years later, Ste finally had his life back under control. Ste and Jed were living together and the village was glad that Ste was finally under control and happy. Many people in the village had worried about Ste for years and had hoped that someone like Jed would come along and make everything better.

Ste's children loved Jed too and he doted on them. He always brought them gifts and made them dinner and allowed them free reign over the television when they stayed. Jed was shocked when he first met the children. He couldn't believe that Leah was 16 and Lucas was 14, Ste just didn't seem old enough but he grew to love them like they were his own.

However, it was the beginning of August in 2023 when Ste's life began to take another turn, and this time, Ste wasn't sure which direction it was going in...

Ste was watching the television waiting for five o'clock to roll around so he could start making dinner for Jed's arrival home from work. Ste was working part time in Tony's café as Jed was insistent that he shouldn't work too many hours for fear of a relapse so, Ste spent most of the time making sure the house was tidy and dinner was ready and he liked it that way.

It was time for the news when a familiar face flashed up on the screen Ste couldn't peel his eyes away. He could feel his breathing becoming uneven as the news reporter spoke, "Police have now reopened a ten year old case after new evidence has come to light. Brendan Brady, convicted of five murders, has gone back onto trail, this time with a strong chance he could be proven innocent. We'll be following this can keeping you updated as much as we can".

Ste didn't know when the tears had started falling down his cheeks or when he had moved closer to the screen but he had found himself with his hand touching the television. Brendan could be getting out of prison he thought and he stood up, looking at the coffee table before he booted it, breaking one of the legs, "Why now?" he screamed, "Why now when my life is getting good? Why now when I have Jed?" he finished before he collapsed to the floor and pulled his legs up to his chest, sobbing into his knees.


	2. But He's A Monster?

**Author Note**: So in my first chapter, I told you that this story would involve people who died or left and that will become obvious now as Amy and Ally are a couple in this story. Also, this story is not Jon Paul friendly, but it doesn't severely bash him either.

Thank you for the great feedback, was really great to get some. **Runningshoes39**, **Both Guest**s and **NickyM1**, I am glad you liked the first chapter and here is another installment.

**Samia**, je vous remercie pour vos aimables paroles. Je ai dû utiliser Google à la fois à comprendre ce qui se écrit et ce qu'il faut écrire dos. Je ne ai jamais été bon à l'écriture de longs chapitres, donc je ne peux que me excuser pour cela. Je espère que vous continuez à lire. (thank you for your kind words. I had to use Google to both understand what was written and what to write back. I have never been good at writing long chapters, so I can only apologize for that. I hope you continue to read.)

**coloredwords**, I won't be including the unborn child with Sinead. If I am honest, I don't really watch current Hollyoaks, in fact I only started watching again about a week ago, so I'm not particularly clued in on the current affairs. Sorry if this bothers you.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Amy liked to spend her days off visiting Ste, keeping him updated on the kids and making sure he was doing well, something she tried to do more then once a week.

It had taken her a long time after Ste's problems ended to trust him again but, when Ally had explained that the kids were probably the only thing Ste had left worth living for and keeping him on the straight and narrow, she had reluctantly agreed to let him see them again.

It wasn't till after Jon Paul had left that Amy had let the kids stay with Ste. Amy had never found their relationship healthy and she didn't want Jon Paul to be too involved with Leah and Lucas, scared that the unhealthy relationship would leave lasting impressions on them. When Jed and Ste had started seeing each other, Amy was over the moon and, after a few months and taken to Jed herself, she allowed the kids to stay as much as they wanted.

It was the fact that she had a day off that had led her to be in the village the day the news of Brendan Brady had hit the headlines. She wasn't aware of the news until she had let herself into Ste's flat and found him, curled up on the floor, tears rolling down his cheeks, his knees pulled up to his chest. Without hesitation, she ran over to him, throwing her bag to the floor before pulling him into her shoulder and letting his cry. She gently rubbed his back and asked, "Ste, what happened? What's got you into this state?".

It took a good half and hour of embracing each other for Ste to have controlled himself enough to talk. If he was honest, he felt pathetic, clutching onto Amy as is she was able to give him strength, but he was feeling weak and anything would help. He took a few deep breaths and before gently whispering to Amy, "It's Brendan", and he felt the tears build up again, begging to drop from his eyelids as he fought to keep them at bay, "He... He's back on trial and they reckon he'll get out this time".

Amy's mouth dropped open and she felt like she had been punched in the stomach so, she couldn't even imagine how Ste must be feeling. The idea that Brendan could come back and ruin everything Ste had worked so hard towards, ruin his life again, it broke her heart. She nodded and kissed the top of Ste's head, "It's OK Ste, he can't hurt you any more. You have all of us to protect you, that's if he chooses to come back".

Ste gulped, moving his head away from Amy's chest, shaking it the whole time he did, "You don't understand Amy" he sobbed, using his hand to wipe his face, trying to get rid of the tears that had started falling again, "I love him. I always have. I've never gotten over losing him the first time and, if he comes back, I don't think I can handle that again".

Amy recoiled away from Ste when he muttered those three little words. After all this time, after everything he had done to him, Ste still loved Brendan. She was angry. Brendan had done nothing but destroy Ste when he was last here and he hadn't even been there for the aftermath. She stood up, shaking her head at him, trying to hold back her own tears of anger, "You love Brendan?" she said, disgust lacing her voice as her hands began to shake with rage, "After everything he put you through? After telling you to just forget him because he was going down for murder? After breaking your heart and leaving you on your own? After letting you watch him take that bullet that could have killed him? How can you love him after that? He's a monster Ste!"

Ste took a deep breath before he stood up, bringing himself level with Amy. How could she say those things about Brendan when he was the one who had given him happiness, even if it was just a sliver. He gulped, trying to remove the lump in his throat which was making it hard to speak, before rubbing his eyes, trying harder then ever to stop the tears gushing down his cheeks, "You don't understand Amy!" he repeated, his voice slightly raised as a wave of anger rushed through him, "He gave me a chance when I had nothing. When you took the kids away from me, he was the one who put back the pieces of my broken heart. When I got diagnosed with HIV, he was the one who I wanted to be held by, not Jon Paul and, when I was told I had been cured ad Jed was sat there, on that sofa, cuddling me and whispering to me how proud he was of me, it was Brendan's voice I heard and his hands I felt".

Amy shook her head, her own tears falling down her face and dropping from the bottom of her chin as another wave of fury rushed through her, "Jed loves you and has done nothing but support you and this is the thanks he gets? You find out that Brendan may be released and you are just dying to run back into his arms!" she said, he voice raise as she picked her bag up, ready to depart, "For your sake, I really hope you think this through and make the right decision. Jed doesn't deserve this and right now, I don't think you deserve Jed" she finished, before turning away and leaving, wiping away her tears as the door slammed behind her. She knew she had to leave, any more talk that glorified Brendan would have pushed her too far over the edge.

Back inside, Ste was seething about everything Amy had said. Of all the people who had seen how much Brendan meant to him, she should have been the one to understand. She was there the day Brendan was taken away and had seen how it had broken him. She was there when he couldn't handle anything any more because he just needed Brendan back and he had hoped that, finding out Brendan was coming back, she would have been more supportive. He took a few deep breathes whilst looking in the small mirror hanging on the wall, his reflection showing just how broken he really was. He looked at the coffee table, one leg snapped completely in half and shook his head, "How do I explain that too Jed?" he asked himself, as he wiped his face for the final time and decided to clean up the mess he had made.


	3. Just A Web Of Lies

**Author Note**: I thought I would post an update today and then maybe another one in the next week but after that, I can't guarantee when an update will happen as I will be back at work and unfortunately my granddad passed away last night, so there will be lots of time put aside for celebrating his life. Hope you enjoy and rate and review.

**Review replies:**

**Runningshoes39**, thank you for your kind words, I didn't realise that I had portrayed them well, I just kept typing so that piece of feedback really cheered me up.

**Samia**, vous remercier pour un autre examen, cela signifie beaucoup de choses à connaître mon histoire est lu par quelqu'un en France. Je ne me sens désolé pour Jed, mais il ne est pas censé être un jeu de fin désolé à ce sujet. Comme indiqué dans le notent les auteurs, je ne peux pas garantir de nouvelles mises à jour pour des raisons personnelles, donc je espère que vous en tenir à l'histoire. Bisous dos.(thank you for another review, it means an awful lot to know my story is being read by someone in France. I do feel sorry for Jed, but he isn't intended to be an end game so sorry about that. As stated in the authors note, I can't guarantee further updates due to personal reasons so I do hope you stick with the story. Kisses back.)

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

It was a little after six when Jed returned home from work. As he walked through the door, he knew something wasn't right. Ever since they had been together, he was always greeted with the smell of what they would be enjoying for dinner, as Ste never worked past 3pm, but today was different. There was no familiar smell and the house was quiet, the television off.

He walked further into the living room and noticed the coffee table. One of the legs had been completely snapped in half. He bent down, getting himself into a crouched position as he touched the table, his feeling of unease only getting worse. He looked around, checking everything else was in order, making sure that there wasn't any signs that they had been burgled and, noted that nothing valuable seemed to be missing and the only damage was, in fact, the coffee table.

He sighed as he walked towards the bedroom and opened the door gently. Ste was curled up on the bed, his knees pulled into his chest, which was raising and falling slowly as he slept. Jed noticed his eyes were red, a very obvious sign that, for some reason before Ste had fallen asleep, he had been crying. He bit his lip, debating on whether to wake Ste and ask about the table but, decided against it and headed back the way he came, closing the door even gentler then he had opened it.

Once he was back in the lounge, he put the television on, keeping the volume low. The news was just coming to an end but the last storyline stole his focus. It was about a man who had been arrested in the village ten years ago. His name was Brendan Brady and if Jed was being honest, he thought he looked like a trouble maker. He listened to the headline, shocked to hear that this man was about to stand trial again and may be released and made a mental note to ask Ste if he knew him. He wiped his face, tiredness overwhelming him as he headed to the kitchen, realising he would have to make dinner this evening.

It was 7:30pm when Ste finally awoke to the smell of bacon. He was initially confused until he looked at the clock on his bedside table. Amy had left at four and he had come to bed very shortly after that, so he had been sleeping for nearly three and a half hours. He yawned and sat up, slowly getting himself of the bed. When he looked in the mirror, he noticed instantly that his eyes were quite puffy so, instead of going to the kitchen to see what was cooking, he went to the bathroom.

In the bathroom, Ste found himself standing in front of the mirror just staring at his reflection. He was angry that he had allowed himself to get into such a state about Brendan. Angry that he had had a massive argument with the mother of his children over someone that had hurt them both. He cupped some water in his hands and splashed them over his face, using his arm to wipe away most of the water and then grabbing the hand towel to get the rest. He sighed and nodded at himself, "Just pretend like nothing happened" he breathed, "Like Amy said, he might not even come back here. He has nothing to come back for". He gulped as he finished his speech to himself and sighed, this was going to be tough.

Jed had heard Ste shuffling around the house so stood up to set the table. He had decided to cook cheese stuffed chicken wrapped in bacon with mashed potato, something he knew Ste enjoyed as it was one of the only meals he had ever really cooked for him. Jed wanted to cheer him up as something had clearly upset him and he wanted to know what had happened to the coffee table.

When Ste finally emerged into the lounge, the dining table had been set and dinner was waiting. Jed smiled at him, "Hey sleepy head" he said gently, standing and walking over to him, kissing him gently on the cheek, "I thought I'd make us some dinner, so you didn't need to worry about it".

Ste smiled and bit his lip, maybe Amy was right, maybe Jed did deserve better then him. He walked over to the table, dragging Jed with him and as they both sat down and he saw the food he smiled, "Wow, you remembered this is one of my favourite meals. Thank you babe".

Jed nodded, a smug look on his face, "Of course I remembered" he laughed, "It's about the only thing I have ever cooked for you and every time, you've always destroyed it".

Ste laughed with him and took his hand for a moment, showing how thankful he was. When he let go, he picked up his cutlery and started to eat, the first bite causing a small moan to escape his lips which, in turn, earned a small laugh from Jed.

After dinner, Jed had suggested cuddling up on the sofa and watching a film and Ste had jumped at the chance to just be held by Jed, the man he was internally convincing himself that he loved. It was half way through the film when Jed sat up slightly and sighed, "Ste" he said gently, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him into his chest, "What happened to our coffee table?".

Ste gulped and bit his lip, it was now or never. He sighed and nodded, "I walked into and stubbed my toe and then kicked it with rage" he lied, moving back so he could look Jed in the face. After all the years of lying about being drugged up or being ill, he could lie very convincingly. He pouted before continuing, "I'm fine though, just a damaged little toe".

Jed laughed and smiled, "Good, cause I thought something bad had happened and was worried you might have broken it on purpose". Jed knew he shouldn't have accused Ste like that but, when they had first gotten together, Ste had been so angry all that time that stuff always seemed to get broken.

Ste felt himself tense up before pushing himself further from Jed, "I'm not like that any more Jed" he breathed, "I don't do that any more" but, he knew this was a lie. He had broken that coffee table because he was angry and upset. He had allowed himself to do that. Jed saying it had confirmed it, Brendan was making him crumble again and he wasn't even here in person.

Jed nodded and lent forward, grabbing Ste's hand and kissing the back of it gently, "I know baby" he said, "I know you aren't, I just wanted to make sure. It was the doctor inside of me. I'm sorry".

Ste bit his lip and moved closer to Jed this time, "It's OK. I know you are worried I am going to relapse but, it has been like five years and I don't plan on ruining that", and he allowed himself to fall into Jed's arms again, as they both tried to forget the conversation and go back to the film.

It wasn't till after the film had finished and Jed had made them a cup of tea that either of them really spoke again. Jed had placed the cups down and taken a seat on the sofa next to Ste again when he finally piped up, "I saw something on the news today, about a guy called Brendan Brady".

Ste bit down on his lip hard, "Yeah, I saw that too. What of it?" he asked, trying to keep his composure.

"Well, they said he used to live in Hollyoaks you know, before he got arrested and I know you have lived here since you were like 15. I just wondered if you knew him?".

Ste thought for a moment, thought about what Amy had said and shook his head, "I knew of him but, I didn't know him. He was a trouble maker and I didn't really want to mix with that sort" he lied, even though the very words stabbed at his heart. He couldn't tell Jed the truth, it would destroy what they had and Ste wasn't ready to lose him. He sighed and shrugged his shoulders, "I hope he don't get out" he said, the emotions coming back. He stood up and kissed Jed on the forehead, "I'm tired, I think I'm going to go to bed now" and he left, not another word said and his tea left, not a single drop drunk from it, on the coffee table.


	4. What Was I Thinking?

Author Note: So, this is the other update I promised... This chapter is more of a filler and the next one will be a slight time hop till about a month later which is where the story really picks up... This is why it's shorter then the previous two...Hope you are all enjoying and if you have any feedback or anything you would like to see, go ahead and leave a review or send us a message :D

Review replies:

NickyM1, I had intended originally for Ste to tell Jed but I decided last minute to change that which opened up more for further in the story. Glad you like it.

Samia, je espère finir cette histoire comme je aime bien les idées que je ai pour elle, mais je vais le faire sur une attente parfois en raison de la mort de mon grand-père. Désolé, je ai supposé que vous étiez de la France, je vous remercie pour la lecture de l'Algérie. (Samia, I hope to finish this story as I quite like the ideas I have for it but I will have it it on a hold sometimes due to my grandfather's passing. Sorry, I just assumed you were from France, thank you for reading from Algeria.)

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Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.

It was late the next morning when Ste finally woke up and Jed had already left for work. For a while, Ste just lay there, not wanting to move, the events of the previous day playing over in his head. How could he have been so stupid to lie to Jed? He could only hope now that Amy was right and Brendan wouldn't come back to the village cause he knew, once he had actually seen Brendan again, he wouldn't be able to lie about it much longer.

After an hour of just laying in bed, Ste finally got up and had a shower. He ran it hotter then normal and let the burning water hit his body, hoping it would was away everything, including his personal problems. He didn't need this, not when Jed and himself were doing so well. Not when he hadn't touched a drug for over five years. Brendan coming back, or even the idea of it, it was pushing him back towards the edge and he couldn't risk falling back over it.

After his shower, he decided he was too drained too cook for himself so ventured down to the coffee shop he worked at. People were staring at him as he passed and he couldn't work out if it was because they had heard about Brendan's potential release and knew of their history, the state he looked or a combination of both. As for his appearance, his hair was still damp, his eyes dark and puffy and his tracksuit didn't match.

Tony had been serving a couple of the school kids who were clearly sneaking out for a coffee fix when Ste entered the coffee shop. He quickly finished serving and stepped out from behind the counter, reaching Ste quickly and pulling him into a large hug. Tony treated Ste like a son, always giving him a chance when people had said he didn't deserve one and now, it broke his heart seeing Ste like this. He spun himself lose of the embrace and walked Ste out the back of the shop, informing the other barista that he would be back when he could.

Ste was glad to be led away from the crowd in the coffee shop. He hadn't realised it but, when Tony had hugged him, fresh tears had started running down his face again and his heart started to ache. There was a short silence between the two men whilst they sat down, Ste opting for the floor again. It was Tony who finally broke the silence, "I can only assume that this is because of the news?" he asked gently.

Ste nodded, staring at his fingers, afraid too look at Tony for fear of losing it altogether, "Yeah" he said, barely audible over the sound of the clatter and chatter coming from the coffee shop, "Yeah, it's about Brendan".

Tony nodded and bit his lip, looking at the younger boy. He hated seeing him like this. It took him back ten years ago when Brendan got arrested. He sighed and knelt down in front of Ste, placing his hands on Ste's, "Look Ste, you have to try and forget about him OK? I know it's hard but it's been ten years and he hasn't even tried contacting you".

Ste gulped, "It's not that easy Tony" he said, his voice breaking as he spoke, "Brendan could be coming back, Amy is really angry at me because I still love him and I lied to Jed about him".

Tony sighed again, this time deeper before saying, "I know you still love Brendan, I think I've known this whole time but you need to try and get over him and quick, because if he comes back, you won't be able to lie about it to Jed any more".

Ste couldn't get rid of the lump in his throat, he knew he had gone in too deep by lying to Jed in the first place. He sighed and looked up to Tony, his eyes wet from tears, "I don't know what to do Tony" he said, almost sounding helpless, "You normally tell me what to do, please help me Tony".

Tony lent forward and pulled the blonde haired boy towards him, resting his head onto the top of Ste's thinking for a moment before nodding gently and saying, "I think that, you need to go home, watch some rom-coms to give you an excuse for the puffy eyes and pray that Brendan knows better then to come back here and ruin your life again". He paused and then added, "Oh and don't worry about Amy, I'll have a chat with her and see if I can sort things out".

Ste nodded into Tony's chest and then allowed Tony to help him up. He wiped his eyes and prepared himself to walk back through the coffee shop, "Thank you Tony" he said, trying to give a weak smile, "I knew you wouldn't judge me".

When Ste finally got home, the first thing he did was boil a kettle and make a cup of tea. Taking it through to the lounge, and turning the TV on, quickly switching it too his DVD mode so he couldn't accidentally watch the news again. He picked out 'The Vow' and put it on, cuddling up on the sofa, pulling the throw of off the top and wrapping it around him.

It was a little after three in the afternoon when Ste heard the front door open and he sat up, slightly confused. Jed strolled into the living room and smiled at him, kissing him quickly on the cheek, "Hey baby" he said, taking a seat next to him, "You seemed really upset yesterday so I managed to score a half day".

Ste smiled at him, grateful to have him home early, "That's really sweet of you babe" he said leaning into him to be greeted by a kiss on the side of his head, "But I was just going to watch crappy girly movies and cry over them" he joked.

Jed sighed and gulped, "You'll cry yourself dry if you're not careful" he said sadly, "I mean, you were crying in your sleep last night".

Ste's eyes widened, "I didn't even know you could cry when you are sleeping. I didn't even have anything to cry about, my dreams were peaceful" he lied again, sounding a bit more convincing now his emotions were slightly under control.

Jed nodded, "Well, as a rule, people only physically cry during their sleep when they are going through negative emotions in their waking life and, we all know you shouldn't bottle things up so, if you need to talk, please talk to me baby".

Ste shook his head, "I've got nothing to be emotional about" he said, his voice sounding defensive, "I have the perfect children, a perfect boyfriend and a great life, what do I have to be upset about?".

Jed sighed and left it, he didn't want to pry too much, it would just anger Ste and he wasn't here for an argument. He decided that it was easier to let Ste come to him when he was ready. He stood up and walked into the kitchen, making himself a cup of tea and then going back to the lounge, picking up 'New Year's Eve' and pouting at Ste, "This one next" and he fluttered his eyelashes.

Ste bit his lip as he watched Jed but was quickly distracted by him picking up the film, "Fine but only because I can't say no to that pouty face" he joked, moving so that Jed could lean against him for a change.

When Jed had rejoined him, Ste smiled at him and kissed his head. He knew he could make this work. Jed never needed to know about Brendan, he loved Jed now and Brendan was history.


	5. You Have To Be Brave Now

**Author Note**: I really wanted to start writing this chapter and decided that, although I only updated two days ago, I might as well update again, get as many as I can in on my week off so that you have something when I go back to work on Wednesday... Plus it is a healthy distraction.

**Review replies:**

**Victoria**, I am really sorry that Brendan hasn't been in the story yet, I didn't want to rush the beginning and hit the middle straight away. I hope you stick with this story as he is coming back and it will be either this chapter or next.

**Samia**, je vous remercie, nous faisons tous vraiment bien vu. Lui manquer si. Jed est parfait pour Ste et dans ma tête, la demande de visage pour Jed serait Adam Lambert donc l'avenir de Jed / Ste réside dans mes mains hehe. (Samia, thank you, we are all doing really well considering. Miss him though. Jed is perfect for Ste and in my head, the face claim for Jed would be Adam Lambert so the future of Jed/Ste lies in my hands hehe.)

**Foreverulove**, thank you for all the reviews, I really loved them all. This story is one I am hoping to stick with and I am very glad you are enjoying it :D

**Runningshoes39**, thank you for yet another review, I thrive off them and improve on any points so it's really nice of you too review. Hope you continue to enjoy the story.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

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A month had passed since the news of Brendan Brady's potential release had hit headlines and, in the run up to judgement day, Brendan's face had found itself just about everywhere... on TV, in newspapers and magazines, on posters around the village and even worse, in every dream that Steven Hay dared to dream.

To Ste, it seemed that he couldn't go anywhere without seeing Brendan's moustached face or overhear someone talking about the impending trial. He had even overheard that a few of the villagers who had known Brendan when he was arrested were planning on attending the trial. Ste wondered if it was karma for lying about to Jed about how well he knew Brendan the whole time but he couldn't tell Jed the truth, it could break them.

People would try and approach him, ask him how he felt and if he was going to the trial but Ste would always walk away. He couldn't talk about it with anyone else. Amy hadn't seen him since their argument and the only other person who knew the whole truth was Tony who was, through all his faults, being very supportive of the situation. Tony had agreed he wouldn't go to the trial, knowing that, if Brendan was released, he would need to be close by for Ste. It was this reason that Tony had told Ste to be in the coffee shop at eleven on the sixth of September, Brendan's judgement day.

Ste had awoken early on that very morning, before even Jed and from the moment he had opened his eyes, there had been a feeling of unease in his stomach. He knew what the day was, he knew what the day meant and he knew how the day could end. The shift in the bed awoke Jed who instantly sat up, worry filling his head as he moved to hold Ste, "Are you OK babe? It's like six" he said, yawning mid sentence.

Ste gulped and nodded, "I just haven't really been able to sleep for the past couple days" he explained, almost whispering, "Just worried that me and Amy haven't made up yet".

Jed nodded and sighed, "Well, now I'm awake I'll go fix us some breakfast" he said, getting out of bed and stretching, "How does Eggs Benedict sound?"

Ste laughed, the idea of eating such a sophisticated meal so early in the morning on the day that it was, it humoured him. He nodded before saying, "We don't have eggs though. Want me to run to Price Slice and grab some?".

Jed shook his head, already dressed in his lounge pants and a plain t-shirt, throwing on his jacket as he spoke, "No, I'll go" he said, walking around to kiss Ste on the head, "You need to relax".

Ste nodded and smiled at Jed, the feeling in his stomach getting worse with every minute that passed, why did he have a really bad feeling about the day? Why was it affecting him so much? Brendan had been gone for ten years and, Ste knew he had changed so, even if Brendan did come, there was nothing saying Brendan would even be interested in him any more.

When Jed returned half an hour later, Ste was already showered and dressed and sat in the living room. The feeling in his stomach had given him a stomach ache and he was holding it, rocking slightly on the sofa in the lounge where he was sat. Jed ditched the bags on the counter and ran over to Ste, "Babe are you OK? Are you sick?" he asked, worry lacing his voice.

Ste shook his head, "I just have a stomach ache" he said, slightly annoyed, "I don't need you to be all doctor about it... People get stomach aches all the time" and, he knew he had gone to far. He had snapped at Jed because he was angry and upset. He bit his lip and looked down, "I'm sorry".

Jed shook his head and stood up, "I was worried because you looked like you were in pain" he said, this time his words sounding quite sad, "I'll just make some breakfast" and he hurried away back to the kitchen, leaving Ste sat with his head in his hands.

When breakfast was served, Ste took a seat at the dining table opposite Jed and tried to take his hand but Jed moved it away before Ste could get to it. Ste gulped and nodded, not saying a word and knowing that, his angry snap earlier had really upset Jed. The rest of breakfast was tense and as soon as Jed had finished his food, he left the table to get ready for work.

Ste finished his breakfast slowly, he was fuming at himself. Why had he snapped? Why had he gotten angry when all Jed was trying to do was help? He sighed and pushed away his empty plate turning as Jed came back into the room, "Jed, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to snap at you. I'm just really stressed out right now".

Jed gulped but an angry look remained on his face, "What about? Brendan Brady?" he said and he watched as Ste's jaw dropped.

"What do you mean Brendan? I told you I don't even know the guy?" Ste said, biting back, a defensive tone being the only thing stopping his voice from breaking.

Jed laughed a small laugh and shook his head, "Yeah you told me that but..." and he paused, bringing his eyes to meet Ste's, "The people I bumped into this morning told be differently".

Ste felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. Someone had told Jed about his history with Brendan. Ste bit his lip and shook his head, "Oh yeah and what did they tell you huh?".

Jed stepped closer to Ste and cocked his head to the side, "They told me that you must be really concerned about Brendan coming back you know, considering how much you used to love him".

Ste grabbed his stomach, feeling like he had no breath left in him. Why would someone do this? Why would someone want to ruin his happiness like this? He nodded, "Ok, yes I lied to you" he said, tears raising to his eyelids as he tried to blink them away, "But that's because I don't love him any more. It's because I love you and I didn't want you to know because he probably won't be coming back and I knew you would react like this".

Jed raised his eyebrows, "So I'm overreacting am I?" he asked, anger lacing his words, "I don't think so. It explains your behaviour the past month. It explains why you've been so emotional and broken and I just accepted that you were having a tough time but the real reason is because Brendan. The real is because the love of your life may be coming back and you aren't over him".

The words stung Ste's heart and he let the tears he had managed to hold back run down his cheeks. He gulped and bit his lip harder then before, trying to think of what to say back. Jed was right and there was no point in trying to lie about it any more. He wasn't over Brendan, not in the slightest. He looked up at Jed and stepped towards him, taking his hand, shocked when it wasn't pulled away, "I should have told" he said, his voice now broken from the emotions and upset coursing through his body, "I should have told you about Brendan but I was scared that, if I did, I would lose you and I don't think I can handle that. Yes, I still love him but when he left, I became a mess and it was you who picked me back up and I need you Jed, God knows I need you".

Jed looked into Ste's eyes and, for the first time, saw all the hurt and pain Ste was really going through. He nodded to himself and pulled Ste into a hug, not wanting to let go, "You aren't going to lose me Ste" he said, kissing Ste's forehead, "I love you but we have to be honest with each other if this is going to work".

Ste nodded into his chest and pulled back, kissing Jed on the lips, "I love you too Jed" he said, breaking apart from him.

Jed looked around quickly, "As much as I wish I could stay and kiss you more, I have to go to work" he breathed, "We'll talk when I get home" and, with leaving one final kiss on Ste's cheek, he grabbed his bag and headed out the door.

Ste didn't stay in the house for long after Jed had left. He had promised to meet Tony at the coffee shop and he didn't really want to be alone right now. He left for the coffee shop after cleaning up breakfast and arrived there just after eleven. The first thing he noticed was that, apart from Tony, the place was empty. He cleared his throat, letting Tony know he was there and said, "I'm guessing a lot of people have gone to the trial then?".

Tony sighed and nodded, "Yeah, they all want to be nosy. I was going to close up and come to you but I thought you'd rather be out then stuck indoors".

Ste walked towards Tony and it was then that Tony could see he had been crying again, "Please tell me you haven't been crying all morning" he said, hugging Ste quickly, not wanting to start the waterworks again.

Ste shook his head, walking over to a couch which was positioned next to a television. He wanted to be able to hear the news when it finally came in. He watched as Tony quickly made them both a coffee and joined him the couch. He took a sip of his coffee and sighed, "Jed found out about me and Brendan this morning" he said, a feeling over guilt rushing through him, "He was really angry that he had to hear it from a random on the street but he was really accepting when I told him it was him I needed and not Brendan".

Tony let out a deep sigh and nodded, "But if Brendan comes back, will that statement still stand?".

Ste fell back on the sofa, it was a question he didn't know if he could answer. He shrugged his shoulders, "Everyone saw what I was like when Brendan got arrested, how much it broke me. I don't need that happening again Tony and I can't trust that Brendan won't do that again".

Tony smiled at the answer, "Well, it's going to be hard but I'll stand by you, no matter what decision you come to".

Ste nodded and thanked Tony, risking a glance at the television. The news was just starting and he felt himself move into a standing position. His hands had clenched into fists, he didn't even know if it would be on the news at this time but fear was coursing through him. Tony had jumped up with him and was stood behind him, ready to catch him if he fell.

The news reporter seemed to go on for an eternity before she finally got to the news that Ste desperately needed to hear. A picture of Brendan's face flashed up on the screen, taking up half the screen and the news reporter looked down at her paperwork before looking back to the camera, "And this just in, the trial involving Brendan Brady had finally come to a conclusion after a month. Brendan Brady was found innocent of all charges at 11:37 this morning and has been ordered for immediate release. According to reports, a lot of people from the village where he had lived turned up for the trial".

Ste didn't hear the last sentence, the word 'innocent' ringing in his head. His knees buckled underneath him and he fell to the floor, landing on all fours. His balled fist kept punching the ground, all the pain and agony he had felt in the past month rushing through him as he pounded the ground. Tony knelt down beside him, trying his hardest to get Ste to stop but he was no good, Ste either couldn't hear him or was choosing to ignore him.

The doors of the coffee shop opened, making Tony look up and upon seeing who it was, he stood and ran over, turning the sign in the door to closed, not wanting people to see Ste like this. He begged the new arrival to go and speak to him and she agreed.

Ste's face was completely soaked when Amy knelt down next to him. He was still punching the floor and from Amy could see, his hand was probably broken. She grabbed his hand and pulled him up, making him turn to face her, "Brendan's been released, you have to be brave now" and Ste collapsed into her, his heart breaking all over again.

A/N: Sorry Brendan isn't in this chapter but I promise you, he will most definitely (unless the plot bunnies attack big style) be in the next chapter!


	6. Two Broken Souls

**Author Note**: Four updates in a week... Really hope you guys don't mind! This chapter took the longest to write, only because I got stuck on one sentence for three hours! Because of that, I want to thank my friends who helped me work it all out on Facebook. Hope you enjoy the chapter, I enjoyed writing it.

**Review replies:**

**Samia**, je vous remercie pour vos aimables paroles et je espère que vous continuez à en profiter. (thank you for your kind words and hope you continue to enjoy it).

**Runningshoes39**, thank you for more kind words and I am really happy to have you as a reader. I had to have Tony in this story, I think he has always been a father figure to Ste and it just made sense for me. Glad you like the story and hope you enjoy this chapter :D

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Amy had agreed to watch the coffee shop whilst Tony took a now calm, if slightly out of it, Ste to the hospital. After the many punches to the floor, Ste's hand had swollen to double it's size with bruising already showing through and it had started to bleed. Ste had originally refused, scared of seeing Jed but Tony had promised to do all the talking and keep the situation under control, as least while they were at the hospital. After about fifteen minutes and realising that his hand was really hurting, Ste agreed to go to the hospital his broken hand covered with a bag of ice, trying to help in any way it could.

When they got to Dee Valley University Hospital, Tony rushed Ste into accident and emergency. He told Ste to sit down whilst he went to the reception desk. The receptionist looked up at him and smiled, "How can I help you today?" she asked, a gentle and soft tone to her voice.

Tony briefly glanced at Ste and looked back the at receptionist, "Hey" he said, a deep breath leaving his body, "I'm here with my friend Stephen Hay. He's 33, lives at 7 Oakdale Drive, Hollyoaks".

Tony waited for the nurse to find Ste on the system and when she located him she nodded and looked back up at Tony, "OK and can I ask the nature of the injury?".

Tony sighed and looked back at Ste, he was completely out of it, like he has in shock. He looked back to the nurse, not able to muster a smile, "I think he has a severe break in his hand and it's bleeding. He got it from continuously punching a floor" he paused, looking back at Ste again, "I think he might be in shock at the moment though". The nurse typed the details onto the computer and reassured Tony that they wouldn't leave him waiting long. Tony thanked the receptionist and walked back over to Ste, watching as the younger boy cradled his hand, rocking slightly in his chair.

It wasn't even a half hour wait before a doctor had called them through into a treatment cubicle. The doctor took one look at the hand and nodded to himself, writing something down before putting his clipboard down and smiling at Ste, "So, Mr Hay? What have we done here?" he asked, taking a seat in front of the bed Ste was sat on.

Ste briefly looked at the doctor before his eyes travelled to meet Tony's, "You said you would do the talking", Ste said abruptly, not even sure if he could talk right now.

Tony looked to the doctor, waiting for some sort of approval and when the doctor nodded he proceeded to explain what had happened, leaving out the why and just saying that Ste was upset. The doctor listened intently before examining Ste's hand.

Ste was too numb when the doctor touched him that he barely flinched. Whenever the doctor asked a question, he simply nodded or shook his head, fearing that if he talked his voice would fail him. After the examination, the doctor got Ste to lie down before connecting him up to a drip which provided him with pain medication and, informed them that a porter would be along shortly to take them to x-ray. Tony thanked the doctor, waiting for him to leave before turning to Ste, "You feeling OK buddy?"

Ste shrugged his shoulders in response to Tony. He didn't know how he felt... His hand was hurting, his brain felt like it was fried and he was too scared to talk to anyone, afraid that if he did, he would just cry, that his body would betray him and bring out his emotions. He also felt angry... angry that he had relapsed and used violence, even if was inflicted upon himself, to deal with his emotions. He rolled over, so he was facing away from Tony and sighed a deep and heavy sigh, he had really messed up this time.

After the x-ray, Ste was wheeled back to the cubicle he had first gone into and the porter informed them that he would go and tell the doctor they were back. Tony thanked the porter before sitting back down on the hard blue chair he had been sat before the x-ray. The cubicle had been quiet since the doctor had first left, neither of the men knowing what to do or say to the other which is why, when the curtain was pulled back and a certain dark haired doctor stepped in, Tony was glad to get away for a break. Tony nodded to Jed on his way out and left the young couple alone.

Jed stood by the curtain and shook his head, "I can't say I have seen the news but I can guess that Brendan Brady is a free man..." he said, disappointment lacing his voice, "And even hearing that made you relapse. Surely that proves he is no good for you", and he stepped closer to the bed, removing his lab coat.

Ste rolled his eyes at Jed's words, biting his lip, not wanting an argument in the hospital, "How did you know I was here?" he asked, his voice proving he was annoyed and not wanting to deal with this right now.

Jed stepped closer still, until he was right next to bed and he took Tony's seat, "I work at this hospital and they all know what my boyfriend's name is" he said simply, "The porter who brought you from x-ray mentioned it too me and the doctor who saw you before needed a hand reading your x-ray".

Ste kept quiet whilst Jed spoke, amazed at how quickly word could get round in a place as big as this. He sighed, "Are you going to tell me or do I have to wait for the other doctor to come back?".

Jed grabbed the clipboard from the end of Ste's bed, reading the admittance notes and then putting them down, "Ste, you broke your hand, pretty badly" he said, keeping it simple and wanting Ste to understand, "You're going to have to go into a cast for at least six weeks after which time we will x-ray it again to decide if it need surgery".

Ste gulped, his eyes never leaving Jed's as he spoke. He couldn't believe how messed up he had gotten over something that he had tried so hard to be brave over for the past month. He bit his lip and broke his eye contact, "I'm sorry Jed" he breathed, almost inaudible.

Jed leant forward, gently hugging him, "I'm not angry Ste. I think I expected something like this after the coffee table incident, I just didn't expect it to be this bad" he admitted, breaking away from him, "We are going to cast the hand as the laceration's aren't bad and then you will be discharged. I'll go tell Tony to go home and I'll take you home myself" and, before Ste could argue, Jed disappeared to speak to Tony.

Tony has been floating around the waiting room, a fresh cup of tea in his hands. The stuff tasted rancid but it's what he expected from a machine that made at least nine other drinks. He had been sat for about fifteen minutes when he looked up and spotted Jed. He stood instantly and walked over to him, "How's he doing?" he asked, the concern he had for the young boy ever present in his voice.

Jed smiled at him and let out a sigh, "Well, his hand is definitely broken and they are casting it now" he explained, "Thank you for bringing him in Tony and for looking after him today, I can't imagine it's been an easy task but I'll take over from here, you go on home".

Tony gave a small laugh, "No it was no easy feat but Amy did help..." he paused for a moment before resting his hand on Jed's shoulder, "Look after him and be patient with him. He'd kill me for telling you but there is a lot more to the Brendan and Ste story then you'll ever know" and with that, Tony turned and left, not wanting to explain any further.

On his way back to the cubicle, Jed had bumped into his boss and explained the situation, reassuring him that if he wasn't coming in the next day, he would call. His boss was extremely understanding and wished Ste a speedy recovery before dismissing Jed.

When Jed had returned to Ste's cubicle he was glad to see that his hand was already in the process of being put into a cast. The drip had already been removed and his chart showed that he had been given oral painkillers. Jed spoke to the doctor about what pain medication Ste should be prescribed and they settled on co-codamol and extra strength ibuprofen. Jed decided to go and collect the drugs whilst the cast was finished and when he returned, he started gathering up their belongings.

It was about half an hour later and they were in the staff car park, climbing into Jed's car. The journey home was quiet, the painkillers making Ste feel drowsy. Jed kept checking on him out of the corner of his eye, gently nudging him every so often to try and keep him awake for a bit.

By the time they arrived back in the village, word had already spread that Ste had had a mental breakdown. Jed parked up and helped Ste out of the car. Jed felt the intense staring from the people stood around, their eyes fixed on the casted hand being held up by a sling. Jed shook his head at the nearest group, "You not got anything better to do!?" he spat, his words laced with anger. However, Jed didn't have much time to worry about the onlookers. The body he was holding up, Ste's body had suddenly gone rigid. He looked towards Ste and noticed his face had drained of all colour, Ste's gazed fixed on something in the distance. He followed Ste's bewitched glare, scared of what he might find but thinking he knew the answer already. Standing, only a short distance away was a man he had seen before, only on television but he would never forget that face... Standing there, staring straight back them was Brendan Brady.

Jed was glad to be holding Ste because he was able to catch him as his knees buckled. He gently placed him down on the ground, scared that Ste would fall if he didn't have time to catch himself. He turned back to the moustached man who had made a move towards them and stood up, shaking his head, "Keep away from him" he shouted across the cobbles, glad that Brendan was at a distance. The words stopped Brendan in his tracks but he kept his eye contact on the black haired man. Jed braved a glance backwards at Ste and gestured to him before bravely continuing to shout, "You've caused enough damage".

* * *

Brendan tilted his head to the side before breaking his eye contact and looking at Ste and taking in his appearance. He noted the obvious first and that was that Ste was injured but he could see past that. He was one of the only people who could read Ste like an open book. He could see that Ste was hurting and he could see that Ste was broken. Ste had been staring at him the whole time and the look in Ste's eye broke his heart. He gulped, trying to remove the heavy lump in his throat... he didn't want to leave but this person, the man shouting at him, protecting Ste was right, he had caused enough damage. He sighed once more, and looked around, people had gathered and they were all staring watching the scene unfold. His eyes locked with Tony briefly, just enough time to see him point to a coffee shop. He bit his lip, fighting the tears that had sprung to his eyes. This was not how he had imagined his reunion with Ste going. He chanced one final look at Ste, who was still staring at him and nodded, "I love you Steven" he whispered, aware that no one would be able to hear him before turning on his heel and walking towards the coffee shop, he needed someone to talk too, probably just as much as Ste did.


	7. Father Figure

**Author Note:** I know I have updated this story loads the past week but, I am returning to work on Wednesday and I won't be able to update as regularly. Maybe down to two updates a week. Thanks for the reviews, I love reading what people think.

As a heads up, this story will continue on to follow the relationship of Brendan and Ste so there is a lot more to come... If you would rather I didn't do that, please let me know and I'll consider doing some of it as a sequel.

**Review replies:**

To both the **Guest Reviewer** and** Samia**, thank you ever so much for the review and here is another chapter for you.

To my Facebook reviewers and help, **Ollie (one of my bestest!)**,** Jo** and **Sam**, thanks for reading and hope you like it.** Sam,** thanks for stopping me from going crazy during Chapter 6!

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Tony had waited for Brendan outside the coffee shop, fearing Amy's reaction if he took him inside. When Brendan finally caught up to him, he led Brendan to his house, not a word being spoken between the two of them. Even going into the house and arriving in the immaculate living area the silence stayed with them. It wasn't until Tony had made them both a coffee and brought it too the lounge that he finally broke the silence, "What are you doing back here Brendan?" he asked, sure he knew the answer.

Brendan slurped his coffee, nodding in approval at the cup but, not overly shocked that Tony was capable of making a good beverage after all, he had owned many coffee shops and café's in his time in the village. He sighed at Tony's question, not really sure of the answer himself. He would be kidding himself if he said it wasn't for Ste, but a part of him knew that Ste wouldn't have waited for him and it was stupid to have expected him to. He shifted his gaze from the the slightly weathered rug, the only item that felt used in the house, and looked Tony in the eyes, "Che-Chez" he breathed, his thick Irish accent as strong as it was before, "I came back to get my club back".

Tony tilted his head to the side, "You really expect me to believe you didn't come back here for Ste? After that show in the street just now?" he quizzed, he knew he had to be careful with what he said, not wanting to upset either party.

Brendan gulped, "I've no reason to lie to you" he said simply. He had vowed in prison that when he finally got released he would change. He would live an honest and crime-free life, he didn't ever want to go back. He swigged his coffee again and nodded, "Who is he Tony?" he asked.

Tony sighed, all of this, it would put him in an early grave if he wasn't careful. He bit his lip before drinking his own coffee and moved to sit on the couch opposite Brendan, "That was Jed" he said simply, his eyes fixing on the mug in his hands, "Him and Ste have been together for five years now".

The words stabbed at Brendan's heart. Ste had been committed to this guy for five years, five years that they should have had together. He felt the tears spring to his eyelids again and blinked a few times, hoping they would stay at bay, "And Steven loves him?" he asked, not sure if he wanted to hear the answer.

Tony would be lying if he said that he liked Brendan but, watching Brendan like this hurt almost as much as watching Ste over the past month. He closed his eyes, a headache from the events creeping in and upon opening them, fixed his gaze on Brendan. He stood and walked towards him, clapping a hand on his shoulder before sitting next to him, "Had you asked me that a month ago..." he begun, not knowing if he was in the right for speaking his mind, "...I would have said yes, without skipping a heartbeat but, this past month, I don't know. Ste's been really weird, like watching you on television was breaking his heart all over again".

Brendan didn't even try and fight it any more and he let a tear slip out of his eye. It rolled gently down his cheek and dripped of off the bottom of his chin before he even made an attempt to wipe it away, "I think prison's made me soft" he said, trying to bring some humour to the room.

Tony allowed a small laugh before shaking his head, "I don't think prison has done that" he breathed, "I think seeing the love of your life after ten years played the most important role".

Brendan finally turned to face Tony, "I have to go" he said, scared of his own reaction, "I brought back 2 Oakdale Drive so I have a lot to do there" and he stood up, placing his half empty mug on the table.

Tony stood with him and nodded, "Good luck with the club" he smiled, the first smile he had managed all day, as he walked Brendan to the door. Once there, he gave Brendan a quick hug, silently telling him that he would always be there for him is he needed him.

* * *

Brendan walked through the door and quickly turned back to Tony, "Don't worry about all this" he nodded, almost reassuring himself, "I'm going to keep away from Steven. I'm not going to hurt him again" and, without another word, he left, not ready for Tony to see him lose it.

Elsewhere in the village, Jed had managed to get Ste home and into bed. He had decided to sit with him, not wanting Ste to be alone at a time like this. He sighed and turned onto his side, facing him before interlocking his fingers with Ste's, "Ste" he braved, kissing the younger man's arm as he did, "I saw the way you looked at him, out in the street. Do you think you'll ever get over him?".

Ste rolled his eyes and pulled his hand away from Jed, he wasn't prepared to have this conversation. He rolled onto his side, gently resting his broken hand next to his face and looking at the clock on the bedside table. He watched as it ticked by, the big hand finally reaching the twelve to signify it was now six o'clock. He sighed, "Jed, I want to sleep" he stated, showing that no conversation would be happening tonight. He felt the bed move and then felt himself sink slightly as a blanket was thrown over him, he was already so done with this day.

It was mid-morning when Ste finally awoke. He was meant to be staying in bed but he knew he couldn't, it would drive him crazy. He sighed and turned, noticing that the space next to him was empty, Jed must have chosen to sleep in the lounge or had gone to work and was hoping he wouldn't wake up till he came home. He spent twenty minutes trying to get dressed and, when he had managed to get into a comfortable pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt, he put his sling back on and then threw his jacket over the top. His next stop was the bathroom where, he tidied his unruly hair and took his medication, if only to dull the throbbing sensation in his hand and then he headed into the living area.

He noticed instantly that the place had been cleaned and the broken coffee table had gone. This alone told him what he needed to know. Jed liked to clean and be away from Ste when he was angry, so Ste knew that Jed was angry about the events of the previous day. It annoyed Ste to no end that Jed, his doctor boyfriend, would leave him to fend for himself in the condition he was in. He kicked the chair of the dining table before stopping and stilling himself and grabbing his keys of off the counter. He didn't know where to go but he had to get out of the house before he damaged any more furniture.

He had decided to go for coffee at Tony's but, when he had finally reached the village, he felt all eyes on him. He gulped but kept his head held high as people gawked as he passed. He took a few deep breathes, the glares infuriating him but he knew he had to hold it together, he couldn't risk another show like yesterday. It was outside the coffee shop he turned and that's when he saw it, the club's 'FOR SALE' sign had been replaced with a 'SOLD' sign and he knew, he knew that Brendan had brought it. He took in a few shaky breathes and opened the coffee shop door, the word 'SOLD' all he could see.

Tony was cleaning a coffee machine when he heard the door open and he looked up. He quickly put his cloth down and poured Ste's usual, making sure it was ready before Ste even got to the counter. The barista smiled at Ste and went to take his order but Tony shook his head, "I've got this one" he said, holding up a steaming cup. Ste smiled at Tony who was already walking towards a free table.

Ste followed Tony and sat down opposite him but, before Ste could even thank him, Tony asked, "What are you doing here? You should be taking it easy, making Jed do everything for you".

Ste rolled his eyes at Tony, but was relieved that someone cared. He took the coffee with his good hand and drank from it, glad to have something that wasn't water. He placed the cup down gently and looked up at Tony, "Jed wasn't there when I woke up. I think he's angry at me".

Tony huffed, "What right does he have to be mad? It's not like you ran into Brendan's arms as soon as you saw him".

Ste couldn't help but laugh at Tony's rising anger levels, "He's angry cause I didn't want to talk about" he explained and before Tony could interrupt he added, "He's angry because I relapsed. I went back to my old days and I got hurt. I thought I could solve it all with violence and I broke my hand, pretty badly".

"You didn't relapse, you were just emotional" Tony began, "I was here and trust me, it was no where near anything like it was before".

"Thank you for being there" Ste said, emotions creeping up to him again, "I wouldn't have stopped and I wouldn't have gone to the hospital and all this could have been worse. You really are like a father to me".

Tony felt his breath catch in his throat. He had always seen Ste like a son and now Ste was saying he was like a father, it made him feel that, no matter what, he would always have someone to care for. He shook his head, shaking away the teary feeling, "I spoke to him last night you know" he said, trying to catch Ste's gaze.

Ste looked up quickly and met the seeking eyes, "Did he have anything to say? Cause like, I've seen he's brought the club back".

Tony nodded, "Yeah, he told me he was back for the club and..." and he paused, should he really tell Ste the truth right now. He thought for a moment, "...he said he missed the place". Tony knew lying to Ste was probably not the best idea but, if Ste was seriously considering getting back with Brendan, he didn't need to hear that Brendan was going to keep away from him.

Ste gulped and nodded, "I guess I'll have to get used to seeing him around. Be civil to stop an audience" and he gestured around the coffee shop. Those that were watching quickly went back to what they were doing, some people's cheeks going red from embarrassment.

Tony nodded and stood up, going over to the counter and grabbing a takeaway cup. He returned to Ste and picked up his drink, pouring it into the new cup, "As much as I like talking to you and I really am glad you are OK, I think you need to get some rest so, as a responsible father figure, I am sending you home to bed".

Ste rolled his eyes and stood up, taking the takeaway cup of off Tony and wrapping his own hand around it. He let out a small giggle and looked at Tony, "Can you get the door for me Dad?" he teased. Tony laughed at Ste and walked to the door, holding it open for him and bowing as Ste walked through the door, "Why thank you" he shouted back, breathing a sigh of relief as the door closed behind him.

He smiled to himself, the first time he had smiled in what felt like a month and turned on his heel to walk away taking only a step when someone collided with him, knocking him to the ground, the lid of his coffee popping off and splashing the cobbles around him. He winced, his arm instantly starting to throb as he got himself up, "What are you?" he spat, not looking at who had sent him flying, "Are you some sort of an idiot? Watch were you are going..." but he stopped as his breath caught in his throat. He had finally managed to look at the person who had accidentally barged him. His mouth dropped open as he breathed, "Brendan..."


	8. Understanding the 'Devil'

**Author Note:** Hope y'all didn't mind the cliffhanger at the end of the last chapter! Thought it would add some excitement.

Onto a different note... This story consumes a lot of my time and I am returning back to work tomorrow. I work 14 hour days so I won't be able to write until my days off so the next update will be in either 5 or 6 days time! Hope you all hang around with me for that long!

Review replies:

**Samia, runningshoes39, Ollie** and **Jo**... Thanks for you kind words and hope you continue to enjoy this story...** Ollie**, remember that you are amazing as well, and I believe in you.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.

Ste stumbled backwards upon seeing Brendan staring at him. Of all the people he could collide with, it had to be the one man he was trying to avoid. His stumbling turned into genuine backing away as he shook his head, awash with every emotion that was physically possible. It was anger that someone had bumped into, pain from his hand springing free of his sling and upset when he had seen that all too familiar face staring at him. He gulped as he felt his back push against a small wall behind him, "Stay away from me" he spat, cradling his throbbing hand.

Brendan's mouth had dropped open and he hadn't been able to close it, watching Ste crumble in front of him. Seeing Ste like this, it broke his heart and the pained look on his face showed how he was feeling. He took a step towards Ste but stopped when he saw Ste back away. He tilted his head to the side, "Ste, I'm not going to hurt you" he breathed, his Irish accent still thick even after ten years in prison.

Just hearing the voice broke Ste further still and he slid down the wall, landing softly on the floor and pulling his knees up to his chest. He looked up at Brendan, revealing his tear soaked face, his jaw shaking as he tried to speak, "You don't understand" he managed, each word escaping him between heavy sobbing, "Ten years you've been gone! Ten years you've been gone and I've had to live without you! You broke me Brendan".

Brendan bit his lip and walked over to the younger man, kneeling down in front of him as tears of anguish crept to his own eyes. He gently reached a hand and placed it on Ste's knee but was quickly rejected so he recoiled his hand and nodded, "I wish I'd never left you Steven" he breathed, his eyes fixed on a tear that was running down Ste's cheek, "I wish I'd fought but I had to protect Cheryl, you know that".

Ste huffed and shook his head, wiping at his face as he attempted to stand up. His balance was completely off and he stumbled once stood, knocking into Brendan and sending him falling onto his back. He looked down at him and gulped, "What about me?" he asked, every word laced with anger, "Who was meant to protect me?", and he turned, walking away as fast as he could. He hadn't been prepared for this confrontation, not yet anyway.

Brendan had managed to get himself up onto his knees as he watched Ste walk away. He wanted to chase after him, wanted to hold him and tell him he was back and he wasn't going anywhere this time but, he used every ounce of his strength to stop himself. After a few minutes, he stood up, staring at the split coffee, vowing to replace it one day when everything had settled down. He sighed and walked away from the shop, heading towards the club, getting ready to put his all into it, distracting himself for what was ultimately the real reason he was back in the village.

The club showed obvious signs of abandonment. The place was littered with dust, every step leaving a footprint in the floor. Brendan ran his hand along the bar, a thick layer of the grey powder sticking to his hand. He brushed it off on his suit jacket as he walked into his old office. The safe was open, but it was empty, the previous owners making sure that nothing had been left behind. He sighed at the state, wondering how such a popular establishment could have been left to become such a wreck. He had been surprised that the lighting still worked but knew it would go out soon if he didn't phone an electric company. He sat down at his old desk, the chair still the same black chair he owned all those years ago. He withdrew his mobile from his pocket, starting to make work on the necessary phone calls.

Amy was on her way to check on Ste when she saw the door to the club open and that only meant one thing, someone had brought it and she could easily guess who. She took a deep breath as she opened the door and let herself in, looking around at the state of the once booming night club. She walked up the stairs, hearing the one voice she couldn't stand to hear coming from the old office. She nodded to herself, inhaling deeply, the dust tickling her nose. She held back a sneeze as she walked into the office, "Why did you buy this club?" she asked, ignoring the fact he was on the phone, "No one wants you here".

Brendan had turned to look at the company that had joined him when he heard her speak. He swiftly finished his phone call, before standing and walking too her, gesturing for her to go back into the main bulk of the club. As she went he bit his lip, he knew he had to be sensible about this, he needed to make friends, not gain more enemies. He sighed as he looked around, "Ten years ago, this place was my haven..." he started, not caring if Amy wanted to hear his speech, "...I made this place a success. I turned my life around. After myself and Steven returned from Dublin, I was different. The only reason it didn't initially work was for many reasons, one of them being you".

Amy's jaw dropped, "What the hell did I do wrong? You were the violent bully!" she spat at him.

Brendan nodded, "I was a violent man but, that was before Steven and Doug got together. I went to Dublin after I made a deal with God that, if Steven survived the accident at his wedding, I would leave him alone and, I stuck to my part of the deal but Steven, he came and found me". Brendan paused, he wanted Amy to understand that she was ultimately one of the reasons Ste and himself weren't going to work. He gulped before continuing, "When we returned, everything was going perfectly. We were finally a real couple, a couple who were out and proud but things got in the way. My homophobic father came back, Doug came back and then you, you took Steven's children away from him and the only way he was going to get them back was if I was out of the scene".

Amy felt her breath leave her as she listened to what Brendan had to say. She could feel herself being drawn in by him. She shook her head, "Nothing will make me think highly off you" she said, looking down to the floor.

Brendan shrugged his shoulders, "That is not what I am trying to do I just want you to listen to what I have to say before you go ahead and condemn me". He looked to Amy for a reaction and, when she didn't give one, he continued, "The day I got arrested, Steven found out something about me that only Cheryl and him know" and he paused, trying to clear his head off the thoughts. He wasn't planning on telling anyone else and if him and Ste ever rekindled, he would make sure Ste kept it quiet as well. He gulped, tears stinging his eyes as he blinked them back, "Steven told me that, after it came out and after I had told Cheryl myself well, he told me that we could have our happy ever after. The police assumed it was me who killed my father but the CCTV outside the club framed someone else and now they are looking for that person".

Amy had moved her hand to her mouth when Brendan confessed everything too him. She bit her lip, "What did Ste find out? How does that make you coming back here now any better?" she asked, only this time, her voice was calm without a single angry word spoken.

Brendan shook his head, allowing one single tear to run down his cheek. Amy looked to see the tear and he heard her gulp across the club. He sighed, "I'm not willing to talk about what Steven found out, that's personal but it makes all the difference because, I didn't give Steven what he wanted. I broke his heart and everyday I was in that hell, I told myself that it could have been different. That if I'd just decided to tell the truth, then I would be free, happy and living with the only person I have ever loved. I'm not going to hurt him Amy" he said, more tears freeing themselves from his eyes, "I love him but I'm going to let him go. He's better off without me anyway".

Amy felt her face going red and before she could let Brendan see her weakness, she turned on her heel. She needed to get out of the club. She ran back down the stairs and let the door slam behind her as she stumbled towards the alley way. She didn't want people to see her as tears started spilling down her own cheeks. What had Brendan done to her? She didn't want to feel for him, she hated the man but, the way he spoke, the fact he allowed himself to cry in front of her, it told her something bad had happened that day ten years ago and it told her that, it definitely wasn't Brendan who had killed his father. She took a few minutes to calm herself down and then re-emerged from the alley, glancing briefly back to the club. She wanted to make sure Brendan was OK but she had to put him behind her and focus on Ste and he family. She nodded to herself and headed towards Ste's place, wanting to hold him and just say sorry.


	9. Unconditional Love

Author Note: I'm back with this weeks update! Hope you guys didn't mind the wait too much! Question for you all... Anything you would like too see?

Review replies:

All I can really say is... Thank you for your continued support. I have writers block and it's taken a lot of energy to get this chapter up but I promised you all a chapter, so here it is.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.

When Amy arrived at Ste's, she wasn't prepared for the scene that met her. She had let herself in, like she always did and was greeted with the sound of a plate smashing. She panicked and dropped her bag onto the floor, rushing into the kitchen and finding Ste staring at the remains of what she could only assume was half the cutlery the house had. She ran to him and pulled him into a hug, letting him cry it all out and stopping him from breaking anything else. Once she had managed to get him to calm down, she sent him into the lounge and whilst she cleaned up the mess, being careful not to cut herself.

Once any and all evidence of damage was gone, she made two cups of tea and poured a glass of water, grabbing the painkillers on the counter and taking everything into the lounge. She placed the drinks down on the floor, noticing the coffee table was now gone. She handed Ste the water and the painkillers and watched as he took them. His hand must have been killing him by now, she thought. She watched as he settled back into the sofa, his face wet from tears and he winced as he placed his arm back into his sling.

Ste bit his lip, aware that Amy was watching his every move and sighed, "Don't worry" he said quietly, "I won't break anything else".

Amy let out a small laugh and nodded, "I think I can guess why you were smashing plates but I'd rather you tell me".

Ste gulped and looked up Amy. The last time they had been here, Amy had left in a foul mood and he wasn't prepared for another argument but he couldn't lie to her, she always knew if he was lying. He bit his lip again and nodded at her, "I literally ran into Brendan outside the coffee shop".

He thought for moment about how to word his next sentence but Amy cut him off, "And you noticed how much he changed right?" she said delicately, placing her hand over his good one.

Ste's breath caught in his throat, did Amy just say something nice about Brendan? He sat up slightly, bringing his eyes level with Amy's and tilted his head to the side, "What do you mean, I noticed how much he's changed? Have you seen him?".

Amy nodded her head slowly, not sure whether she should tell Ste about what Brendan had said, but she wanted him to know that she understood now. Understood why Ste loved Brendan but wanted him to understand that he had to try and make things with Jed work. She took a deep breath and started, "I went and spoke to him in the club. I wanted to tell him that he wasn't welcome here. That he should just pack up and leave but, he told me things that I never knew before. He told me that you were meant to have a happy ending, that if I hadn't have taken Leah and Lucas away from you, you could have had that long before he even got arrested and I'm so sorry Ste". Her own eyes were shining with the tears she wouldn't let fall as she apologized but she continued still, "He told me that he's going to leave you alone. That even though he loves you, you are better off without him".

Ste's mouth dropped when she said that one word. Brendan still loved him. He gulped and shook his head, "Why are you telling me this Amy?" he asked, his voice strained with emotion.

Amy looked down towards the couch cushions. She didn't want Ste to see her weak when she meant to be keeping strong for him. She closed her eyes briefly and upon opening them, looked up to Ste, "Because I think you need to let go too" she whispered, knowing Ste wouldn't like hearing the words, "Because I think you should really push for you and Jed to work because he has done nothing but support you".

Ste raised an eyebrow and broke free off Amy's grip to gesture around the house, "He's done nothing but support me? Then where is he now Amy? I broke my hand yesterday and he left me to look after myself because I didn't want to talk about Brendan".

Amy shrugged her shoulders, "Think about how hard this is for him Ste" she begged, "He thought that the two of you were in love and then, this mystery guy from your past, the mystery guy you were unconditionally in love with, comes back and he could face losing you".

* * *

Ste stood up again, ignoring the pain the sudden movement brought to his arm. He began to speak but he heard a cough behind and turned, Jed was stood in the doorway and he had tears running down his cheeks.

Amy had excused herself shortly after Jed had arrived, she knew the situation was going to get tense and she didn't want to get caught up in it.

When she had left, Ste was still stood staring at Jed, both men had tears running down their cheeks. Ste waited for the door to close before he asked, "How much of that did you hear?".

Jed bit his lip to stop it wobbling and gulped, trying to dislodge the lump in his throat, "I heard the part where you told Amy how unsupportive I am for not being here. I heard Amy say that Brendan was the man you loved unconditionally and I heard that he still loves you Ste".

Ste felt like his heart was going to shatter, more then it already had. He had never seen Jed cry, it was just something Jed never did. He looked down to the floor, watching his feet move as if they weren't controlled by him any more. He wiped his face quickly and forced himself to stand still, "It doesn't mean anything to me Jed" he breathed.

Jed shook his head, "We both know that isn't the truth Ste. You told me that you still love him and Amy told you he feels the same. What chance do we even stand?".

Ste felt his breath catch again and his breathing quickened. He shook his head desperately, "We stand every chance because I love you" he pleaded, "I love you Jed and I need you, please don't do this".

Jed bit his lip, watching the broken man in front of him. He stepped forward, bringing himself to met Ste and took his good hand in his, placing the other on Ste's chin and lifting it too meet his eyes. He knew that, no matter how hard this was for him, it was one hundred times harder for Ste. He placed a gentle kiss on Ste's lips and pulled back, "I won't do this but you have to help me help you" he breathed, "I can't share this relationship with a memory, especially one as strong as this".

Ste licked the spot where Jed had kissed and nodded at what Jed was saying. He knew that he couldn't go on doing this. He knew that he had to make things better for himself and for Jed, this had already gone on for longer then it needed too and Jed was being really patient with him. He kissed Jed back and nodded, resting his forehead against Jed's, "I promise you that, from here on out, it's just me and you. I'll never get over him but I'll move on".

Jed smiled at Ste and let go of his hand to wipe his face. He retook Ste's hand and pulled him to the couch and sitting down, pulling Ste onto his lap. He bit his lip and sighed, "How about we cuddle up, watch a movie and order take out for dinner?".

* * *

Ste allowed himself to fall into Jed's lap and kissed him after the suggestion, "That sounds perfect" he whispered, placing another gentle and delicate kiss onto Jed's lips.

Author note: Y'all call with a time skip in the next chapter? So I can get the ball rolling on the Stendan? Also apologizing for length but if you let me have a time hop, you should get a longer albeit emotional chapter next time?


	10. Where It All Begun

**Author Note:** Couldn't wait to write this one, hope you enjoy! Hope this isn't too much for you guys but I've had this story planned for a long time and this is kinda where I wanted it too go. Plus, let's play a game of 'which scene from this chapter is very similar to a scene from Hollyoaks about 2 years ago'...

**Review replies:**

Thanks for the go ahead to time skip. I know it's my story but I didn't want to upset my readers. Thanks for sticking with me and hope you like what is too come.

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Two months had passed since the day Jed and Ste had agreed to that it was just going to be them and Brendan was going to be forgotten about and for the first month, that statement had stood true but, come the beginning of October, Che-Chez had opened it's doors once again and business there was booming and it was the place to be. Jed had started to notice that Ste seemed to be spending most night there.

On opening night, the whole village had turned up to celebrate and nearly everyone seemed to be getting on with Brendan. This shocked Jed at first as he had heard nothing but bad things about him in the early days of the trial. Jed knew he had to take the higher ground when it came to Brendan so, when he was offered a free drink, he took it, making sure to grab hold of Ste's hand as he did so. He noticed the look in Brendan's eyes when he made the small gesture and he knew this was probably really hurting him but he needed this guy to know that Ste loved him now.

It was the weeks after opening night that Jed started to worry. It seemed that, most nights he would come home from work and find a note on the table telling him dinner was in the oven and he was at the Dog, grabbing a drink with whichever random person wanted to for one and, if he didn't have a note, he would come home to find Ste getting ready to go out.

Jed had been to the club with Ste a few times and, he always found himself sat alone whilst Ste danced and drank with random people or propped himself at the bar talking to the staff who worked there. Ste seemed to get on with Rhys, the main bartender and it didn't bother Jed when they were talking but, when Brendan would show up, Ste would watch him and then come over and tell Jed how much of an idiot he was.

It was the end October when Jed finally had enough. He gotten home from work and found another one of Ste's notes. The difference between this note and the other's was that it was messy and the beer can's laying around the house told him why, Ste had been drinking before he had gone out. He walked over to the oven and pulled it open and found that there was no dinner. Jed let it go, knowing he shouldn't have to rely on Ste to make dinner for him every night and especially today as Ste had been to have his cast removed. He sighed to himself and walked into the bathroom to get dressed. He couldn't be bothered to cook so he was going to go and meet Ste and have dinner at the Dog.

When he arrived at the Dog, he was angry at the scene in front of him. Ste wasn't drunk but he was getting there. He could tell because talking was no longer a thing for Ste, he was shouting. He walked over to the group consisting of Ste, Darren, Tony and Jack and placed a kiss on Ste's cheek before sitting down next too him. Ste smiled at him, "Sorry I didn't make you dinner" he said, a smile across his face.

Jed shook his head, "And what about the beer cans littering the house?" he asked, trying to keep the anger out of his voice.

Ste bit his lip and laughed, thinking it was all a big joke, "I bumped into the lads when I got back from the hospital and got talking about having a drink and then that kind of just happened".

Jed sighed a deep sigh and ran is hand down his face, "It's really infuriating to come home from work to a mess like that" he said, his voice tired.

Darren stepped in, "Look mate, we were just having a few drinks and we should have tided up. Let me get you some grub in and a couple drinks and we can all have a good night" he suggested, not wanting an argument to kick off.

Jed smiled at him briefly and nodded, "That would be great thank you" he replied before turning back to Ste, "You guys just staying here for the night?" he asked.

Ste shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know. We were talking about heading to the club after, apparently they have cheap drinks tonight" and he paused, looking at Jed's down down-hearted face, "Probably some con though".

Jed felt his lip curl as he stood up, "You're going to the club? Again? You are so pathetic" he spat, turning on his heel and heading towards the door.

Ste's mouth dropped as he looked at the others, all of them looking uncomfortable. He took a breath and then followed Jed, catching up to him just outside of the Dog. He grabbed his arm and spun him around, "What the hell was that about?" he shouted, not caring about the audience he was drawing in.

Jed laughed his head shaking, "Oh I don't know, how about the fact that in the last 30 days, you've gone to that god-forsaken club at least 24 of them" he spat, throwing his hands up in anger.

Ste bit his lip and thought for a moment, "What does it matter if I'm at the club? I'm going out and having a good time! Something you seem to have forgotten how to do!"

"It matters because you go to the club for him" Jed spat, his voice dropping to a lower level, "You don't go there because it's somewhere to drink, you go because of him".

Ste stopped still, he couldn't believe Jed was blaming this on Brendan again. He shook his head, "I go there because it's the only place to drink in this town apart from here" and he gestured back to the pub.

Jed shook his head again, telling Ste he knew he was lying. He felt tears pool in his eyes and he blinked, allowing them to fall down his rosy cheeks. He looked back from the pub, revealing to Ste his tears and gulped, "I can't do this any more Ste" he breathed, "I've tried for months to make this work. I've tried ignoring the fact that that man is back in the village but it's not been good enough for you. You still love him Ste and that's not going to change and I was stupid to think I could try and help change that".

Ste felt his mouth drop open, was Jed really about to do this to him? He swallowed hard, trying to ignore the lump in his throat, "What do you mean? What does this mean?".

Jed sighed and looked down to the floor, "It means we're done" he said simply, bringing his eyes back up to meet Ste's, as he wiped his face, "I can't go on sharing you with Brendan and I won't try to any more. I don't want to get in the way of you and him any more. If you love me, even just a little bit, I need you to be brave for me now" and Jed was fully crying by this point, his voice broken, "I don't know if I can live without you but, I am sick and tired of being second best. I guess I always knew there was a part of you that couldn't let him go but I told myself that that would be OK because I was the only one who could make you happy but, I've seen him and I've known him and now I'm not so sure. So please Ste, don't make this hard on me and I won't make it any harder for you".

Ste's own tears had started falling when Jed had told him to be brave. It had taken him back to when Doug had said the same thing to him. When Doug had left him so he could go after Brendan. He shook his head, "Jed, why are you doing this? You know I love you" he breathed, running a hand through his hair.

"You need to work things out with Brendan, Ste and I'm sick of getting in the way of that. I'm going to move into my mum's so if you can't work things out, I'll only be a few miles away but I really can't do this any more Ste" and he took a deep breath as he felt his lip start to quiver again, "I'm sorry Ste, but I'm done" and he gave Ste one last glance before turning and walking away.

Ste stood outside the pub for a while, tears running down his face as he watched Jed walk away. How could this have happened again? He walked towards the bridge and stood staring into the water for a while as he allowed his heart to break. He wondered what he would do? He couldn't afford the house on the small amount of money he earned working at Tony's and he couldn't be on his own, not after five years of having someone to hold. He walked back to the pub and entered, tears still spilling down his face. Tony was the first one who saw him and the state he was in. He quickly walked over to him and pulled him into a hug, not letting him go as Ste sobbed onto his shoulder.

When Ste was a little more composed, Tony led him back to the lads. He sat down and knocked back the rest of his pint, not giving it a second thought when he ordered another. When it arrived he gulped down a good half before wiping his mouth and looking up at the others, "Jed just broke up with me" he said, his lip starting to wobble slightly, "Apparently I need to work things out with Brendan".

The guys all said they were sorry and took it in turns to clap him on the shoulder before Darren spoke up, "How can he say that when you and Brendan haven't even really spoke since he got back?".

"It's cause I'm always at the club" Ste replied simply. He sighed and shook his head, "I don't want to talk about this, I'm exhausted".

Jack watched as Ste downed the rest of his pint and sighed, "Well you have a choice Ste" he said gently. He was the oldest of the group so he decided he should make a sensible suggestion. He continued, "You can either be sensible and go home and get some rest or you can stay and have a few more drinks with us lads but don't be stupid".

Ste nodded at Jack and tried to give a weak smile before ordering another drink, "No point going back to an empty house is there" he said, taking another large gulp out of his drink.

It was 11pm when Ste found himself stumbling into the club. He had told the lads he was going home but he didn't want to, not when he would be alone. He looked around for someone he knew but it was full of a lot of younger people, in fact he was sure he was the oldest person in the room. He stumbled to the bar and waited to be served, "Can I get two beers" he slurred.

The bartender was a new face and he got the drinks without question, handing them over to Ste. Once Ste had moved away from the bar, the bartender walked to the office, "Boss, I just served a guy and I think he is really drunk. He was capable of ordering his drinks but I think it would be wise to refuse service next time".

Brendan stopped typing at his computer and turned in his chair, "Why did you serve him in the first place?" he asked.

"He was able to ask for what he wanted with only a small amount of slurring. It wasn't until he walked away I noticed how messed up he was", the bartender said, his eyes down on the floor.

Brendan stood up and adjusted his trousers before turning his computer screen off and heading out the door, beckoning for the bartender to follow him. When they were back on the club floor, he had the drunken man pointed out to him and he felt like his heart had stopped when he saw who it was. Ste was standing there, talking to a bunch of strangers and nearly falling on them.

Brendan hurried over and took Ste's arm, apologizing to his new friends and dragging him into the office, "What are you playing at Steven?" he shouted, pushing him onto a chair, "You're wrecked and you should be at home".

Ste giggled and looked up at Brendan, "You've always been so bossy" he said, trying to point at Brendan, "Always telling me what to do. No wonder Jed left me".

Brendan's eyes widened... So that's why he was drunk, because Jed had left him. He sighed and took in a deep breath, "Come on, I'm taking you home" and he lent down, placing his arm around Ste and dragging him back into the club and out into the open street.

Once outside, Ste started talking but Brendan couldn't understand a word of it, his mind was elsewhere. He had heard rumours about Ste from when he was in prison and he wanted to know how true they were but, he could tell that Ste had definitely been messed up at one point and the people were right when they said that they feared a relapse.

Brendan managed to get Ste to his house, taking him straight into bedroom and throwing him onto the bed. Ste clutched onto him and begged, "Please stay with me Bren".

Brendan managed to get Ste's hands of off his shirt and shook his head, "No Steven" he breathed, as he pulled the blanket up on him and watched as he started to fall into a deep sleep, "Maybe one day, but not today" and he kissed him gently on the cheek before turning and leaving, heading back to the nightclub where it all began.


	11. Not Now Not Ever

**Author Note**: So, here is another update. I've been at work for the past four days and all I've done is make ideas for this chapter. I have to say now though that I realised in a past chapter that I said Ste had been cured of HIV... I am aware this isn't possible but this story is set ten years in the future and I'm hopeful a cure will be found which is why I had him cured...

**Review replies:**

Thank you Runningshoes39 and the Guest reviewer for your kind words... Thank you Ollie and Jo for sticking with the story.

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Disclaimer**: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Ste awoke the next morning with a headache to end all headaches. His head was pounding and the morning sun shining through his window hurt, so very much. He pulled the duvet over his head as he let out a whine, why had he drunk so much last night? He stayed under the duvet for as long as his dry mouth would allow before risking getting out of bed and getting some water.

Although the bathroom was only a few steps away and the taste of the cool water was within reach, he had to divert to get on his knees and pray to the porcelain God. His vomiting didn't stop for a good ten minutes and his eyes were red and puffy when he finally made it to the sink. He poured himself a cup of the water and drank it slowly, wanting to keep it down. It was then he had noticed that he was still fully clothed in last night's attire. He shook his head at his own reflection before finishing his water and going back to the bedroom.

As he got dressed and ready to face what would be a difficult day to get through, on account of how bad his hangover was, he thought back to the previous night. He remembered what had happened between Jed and himself. He had remembered feeling crushed and telling the lads. He remembered walking into Chez-Chez but he didn't remember leaving or how he had even gotten home. He assumed he had managed himself because he had been alone when he awoke this morning. He was finally ready, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with a jacker zipped up over it and he only had one place in mind as to where he wanted to go.

The cold air outside hit him hard and he instantly felt like he was going to be sick again. He stopped to compose himself again, pulling his hood up, trying to keep the cold away from him. He reached into his pocket and withdrew the sunglasses he had picked up. He knew wearing them in winter would make him look silly but the light outside hurt his eyes. He placed them over his eyes and continued on his path.

When he reached the entrance to the club, he paused. People were staring at him and he convinced himself it was just because word of his break up had already spread around the village. He bit his lip as he stared at the wooden door, what if he had done something wrong last night? He nodded to himself and pushed the door open, glad that it wasn't locked.

The stairs leading up to his answers seemed like a mountain right now. He removed the sunglasses, glad that the club was quite a dark place and allowed his eyes a few seconds to adjust before he started to ascend the stairs, looking for any sign of anyone who could answer his questions. When he reached the top, the smell of alcohol hit his nostrils and a wave of nausea washed over him. He grabbed his stomach, taking a few deep breaths, allowing the feeling to pass... He really didn't need to vomit on the floor of this place. He looked around, the place seemed empty. He called out, his voice echoing and still nothing. He sighed and turned to leave when he heard a voice behind him, "I'm surprised you're up so early".

The thick Irish accent made Ste freeze, Brendan must have seen him last night. He took a few steadying breaths before turning back around and staring into the blue eyes of the man who captivated him. He gulped, "You saw me last night?" he asked, his voice quiet and timid.

Brendan was leaning against the office door, almost in the shadows. He nodded, "Yes I did, you were a state".

Ste shifted his gaze to the floor, embarrassment shading his cheeks a dull pink colour. He sighed, "Did I do anything wrong?" he asked, scared of the answer.

Brendan let out a small laugh, stepping towards Ste, bringing himself within arm's length, "No" he said simply, folding his arms across his chest, "You came in here and got served before the bartender informed that a young man was very intoxicated and maybe he should be asked to leave". Brendan paused for a moment and rubbed his eyes, he had had a very uneasy sleep. He let out a deep breath before continuing, "I saw you talking to a bunch of random strangers and brought you in here. You told me you and Jed were over so I took you home. You asked me too stay but, I couldn't... Not with you in that state".

Ste felt his cheeks getting hotter. He had asked Brendan to stay with him and he was mortified to hear it. He gulped, trying to remove the lump in his throat, "I'm sorry, I was quite drunk".

Brendan nodded, "I apologize if you thought it wasn't my place but I saw how bad you were and wanted to get you home safely".

The words Brendan spoke made Ste's head spring up and he raised an eyebrow, "I don't you to babysit me Brendan" he said, a hint of anger in his tone, "I've looked after myself perfectly fine for the past ten years!".

Brendan unfolded his arms and cocked his head to the side, "Have you really?" he asked, his knowledge of the past ten years helpful too him now.

Ste scoffed, "Yes really" he said, agitation now hitting him. He didn't know what Brendan was getting at but he made sure to be ready for whatever Brendan had to say.

Brendan thought for a second and then nodded, "So what about the time you caught HIV then?" he asked. He knew the question was harsh but he needed Ste to understand how much he cared, how worried he was.

Ste had not prepared for that and it felt like he had been punched in the stomach. His eyes widened and he felt the pang of tears but he kept them down. He shook his head, "How dare you" he breathed, anger definitely present in his words now.

"Well..." Brendan begun, "You claim you looked after yourself just fine the past ten years but, I know you caught HIV from some guy you hooked up after a drug fuelled night and I was scared you might make the same mistake twice".

Ste bit his lip to stop it shaking. He didn't know what he was most angry about... the fact someone had told Brendan, the fact that someone had been that desperate to ruin his life or the fact the Brendan had actually brought it up. He tried to speak a few times but stopped himself, allowing himself some time to work out what he needed to say. After a few moments he spoke up, "You weren't there when all of that happened, Brendan. A lot of things had happened to me and I made a few mistakes".

Brendan refolded his arms, "Then enlighten me on that Steven. What happened to you? Why did you start taking drugs?".

Ste closed his eyes, did he really have to this now? He looked around when he re-opened them he pointed to the sofa's. He wanted to sit down, not sure how much longer he could stand upright. He followed Brendan over and slumped down on the opposite sofa. It took him back to the night Brendan had been arrested, when they'd sat in the exact positions they were now. He had to take a moment to compose himself, memories of that night flooding his brain.

"I hit alcohol pretty hard after you left" he breathed, not even chancing a glance at Brendan, knowing it would break him, "It broke me losing you and that's when my problems all started. My mum came back, riddled with cancer and she wanted me to help her commit suicide so I did. I admitted it in a court of law but, thanks to Doug, convincing me to make a speech, I got a suspended sentence".

Brendan nodded along with what Ste was saying. He had heard some of this before but he wanted to hear it from the original source. He stopped Ste for a moment, "So Doug came back to help then? What became of Doug?".

Ste felt the breath leave him and the tears stinging at his eyes finally began to fall. He looked up to Brendan with a small sad smile, "Doug died" he said simply.

Brendan's mouth dropped open, "He died? How?".

Ste gulped, "We planned to go away together again, make a fresh start away from the village but, at the leaving party, someone brought a bomb in and it exploded. He died in my arms".

Brendan wanted to hug the younger man and never let go but, he needed to hear the rest of his story. So far it had been full of death and unhappiness and the thought of Ste going through so much pain shattered his heart. He nodded to Ste, wanting him to continue his story.

"Well, Doug dying nearly killed me. I remember getting a bottle of Vodka and some pills and just disappearing to take them but my father turned up and stopped me. A few months later he died, along with my stepmother. I lost four people who were important to me and after my dad died, Jon Paul, my then husband, found me unconscious in a bath tub. It was then I went to rehab but clearly it didn't work cause it was after rehab I ended up getting HIV" and, Ste stopped talking. That was the whole sorry truth. In the space of a few years he had lost so many people. He tried to wipe his face but new tears covered his cheeks.

Brendan felt like his heart had broken. He blinked away the emotion wanting to stay strong for Ste. He had kept eye contact with Ste whenever he looked at him, his eyes becoming glossier with every word. He took a few shaky breathes, "I didn't realise how hard you had it. I'm so sorry Steven".

Ste bit down on his lip, he didn't know what too say. Brendan never said sorry, he never apologized for the things he had done. He shook his head, "If you hadn't have left.. If you had just let Cheryl take the wrap for her crimes, none of this would have happened" and he hadn't realised when but he was on his feet.

Brendan had quickly stood with Ste, moving so he could easily touch him. He knew the blonde haired man was getting worked up and he didn't want anything bad to happen. Brendan shook his own head, "You don't know that Steven. I was only one factor contributing to your addiction, the other things may still have happened".

Ste took a few deep breathes before kicking the table that had just been between them, "If you had have been here, I would have gotten through all of that stuff! I would have had you to stop me from taking that first hit! If you had have been here, I would never have slept with someone else!" and he was slowly losing again, a whole array of emotions rushing through him and fighting to take the reins.

Brendan stepped closer to Ste once more. He wanted to help but he didn't know what to say or do. He observed Ste as he shouted before replying, "I'm sorry Ste but you knew I had to protect Cheryl, you knew I had to help her".

Ste had calmed himself enough to stand still but the words made his legs buckle beneath him. Luckily, Brendan had been quite close to Ste and managed to catch him. Together, they lowered to ground and Ste allowed himself to fall into Brendan's hold, sobbing into his shirt. He knew one day they would have this discussion but he had hoped it wouldn't end like this. He had hoped he would be stronger.

Ste was still sobbing when had managed to compose a reply to, "You told me I changed everything, Brendan" he said, each word separated by a sob or the inability to breathe properly, "As they dragged me out of that ward and threw me against that wall, you told me that I changed everything but you couldn't change a lie to the truth" and he had to stop, his words now incoherent.

Brendan just sat with Ste, gently rocking him in his arms and trying to calm him down. He bit his lip as he tried to think about that day. He nodded into Ste's hair, "I remember Steven" he breathed, "I remember telling you I would never feel any differently about you but it wasn't the right time Steven, it never was for us. Before I got shot, I muttered the words, In another life Steven and I meant them. I meant them because I was hoping that I would get killed by that bullet and put everyone out of their misery. I was nothing but a burden on all of you when I was here the first time".

Ste let the words sink in before he started pounding on Brendan's chest, "Why would you tell me that?" he shouted as the older man tried to stop the punching, "I had to watch that bullet hit, watch you fall to the floor! I didn't think you were a burden, you were the love of my life and we were just starting to enjoy that as a couple" and, he stopped punching, just letting his hands clutched onto Brendan.

Brendan felt his own tears roll down his cheeks and he knew what he had to do. He took a long and deep breath before gently pushing Ste away from him and taking his chin in his hand, "I love you Steven" he breathed, the words taking him back all those years, back to Dublin where it all began.

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Ste's breath caught, making it harder to breathe. He turned his head, breaking it free from Brendan's grip and shakily stood up. He wiped his face on the sleeve of his jacket, "I love you too" he cried, "But I can't do this. Not now and not ever" and he fled, his hangover very much forgotten and, leaving Brendan knelt crying on the floor, his tears leaving water marks on the concrete he was now staring at.

**Author note:** This is **NOT** the end of Stendan... I just don't want to rush things with this story!


	12. Christmas Miracle

Author Note: Not much to say here but please enjoy and sorry for the delay. Also, I know I said I didn't want to rush things but I literally had nothing without a time hop and I really don't like the work here... I don't know, it just seemed so much better in my head.

Review replies:

Thank you for your words again and for reviewing every chapter. I haven't updated, which has made me feel bad but I'm trying to cope with stuff and I'm throwing this chapter together to keep you guys reading.

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

The cold air of December crept up on the village before they knew and people were starting to adorn their old thick heavy coats. Brendan had replaced his light leather jacket for his long black trench with the furry collar and was surprised at the amount of people who had recognized it.

The club was starting to look festive, decorations draped from the ceiling and bar. Brendan hadn't been too bothered with the decorations but Rhys had insisted that it would make the place a little more attractive to customers and had even convinced Brendan to get a 'Merry Christmas' sign to hang outside.

In a way, the decorations would add to the magic of the party that was soon to happen. Brendan had organized a big party for the village, wanting everyone to get together before Christmas and have a good time. He would be lying if he said he had hoped Ste wouldn't come, but this was his way to show Ste he was a changed man.

Ste had heard about the party and Amy had spent nearly a whole day trying to convince him that he should go. He wasn't keen on the idea as he was scared, scared about seeing Brendan again. The pair hadn't seen each other since the day they had confronted each other and Ste didn't really want to see Brendan again. He knew it was silly and he was surprised they hadn't bumped into each other but it had worked for him and it had cleared his head for the time being.

"Ste, you have to go" Amy begged, trying for the umpteenth time to get him to agree, "It's going to be the biggest event this village has seen for a while and everyone is going to be there".

Ste shook his head as he pottered about the house. He had just managed to scrape enough rent to afford to keep the place and Tony had been helping him with other bills. He put the dishes in the sink as he turned to face Amy, "Look Amy, I have finally managed to get myself on track and I don't want all that hard work to go down the pan".

Amy sighed and bit her lip, "Come and stay with me and Ally all night".

Ste tilted his head to the side, thinking hard about what she had said, "If you promise me that, when you see him coming, you'll make me busy, then I'll come but, only for an hour or so".

Amy clapped her hands in triumph, a big smile on her face, "OK, well the party is tomorrow night so you better think about an outfit".

Ste's eyes widened, "Tomorrow night? Tomorrow night! I didn't realise it was so soon!".

Amy shrugged her shoulders, "You already agreed so you have to come" she said, knowing she was pushing her luck, "Ste, it will be OK. Brendan can't do anything with everyone watching. Look, I have to go and make dinner for the kids but just relax and don't worry OK?".

Ste nodded at her and pulled her into a hug, kissing her gently on the cheek and showing her to the door. When she had gone, he took a long deep breath before letting out a strangled scream, why had he agreed to this? Why hadn't he just said he was busy tomorrow night and wimped out? He allowed himself a moment to recover before heading into the bedroom and looking for an outfit.

The next morning, the village was practically buzzing. It made Brendan realize how long it must have been since someone had bothered to organize an event for the people of the village and it made him smile to know, that he was the one causing the excitement. People were passing him on the street, complimenting his idea and explaining how much they were looking forward to the function. The only problem this posed was the pressure to get everything right. He headed into the building before the clock had even struck ten and that's where he would no doubt stay until after the party had finished.

Rhys was already there when Brendan arrived, "Hey boss, you're late" he laughed.

Brendan shook his head and held up his watch, "I think you'll find I'm right on time and now you can pull that delivery in when it gets here" he said, warranting an eye roll from Rhys before he headed into the office. He had lots to do before he even think about unwinding.

It was seven in the evening when Rhys was given the go ahead to open the doors. He was shocked that people were actually waiting to get in, the club never had that type of gathering. He hurried back up to the bar, ready to serve when Brendan grabbed his arm, "Take the night of and enjoy the party" he said, loud enough for Rhys to hear him over the music, "You helped out a lot today, consider it a reward".

Rhys' smile couldn't be hidden as he thanked Brendan and headed to find Jackie. He knew the other workers would be fuming but he had been there since half nine that morning and he was glad to finally be rewarded.

Brendan had sulked back to the office to finish up his business. He had taken a glass of whiskey with him and was cherishing every drop, he didn't want to be too drunk tonight in case his big plan could happen. He finished his work quickly and headed back into the club and his eyes locked onto the one man he had convinced himself wouldn't come. Ste was stood there, a plaid shirt and jeans and his hair perfectly groomed. He licked his lips, this night had suddenly become one hundred times better.

As the party went on and the business was booming, Brendan approached the DJ asking him for a change of pace. The DJ smiled and nodded, looking for the perfect track. He settled on a tune, grabbed the microphone and spoke over the people, "We're going to switch up the pace now and slow it all down, so grab your partners and best friends and have a smooch" and he hit play, the sounds of _'When You Say Nothing At All'_ starting to come over the speakers.

Brendan slowly walked across the dance floor and tapped Ste on the shoulder, "You always said you wanted to dance" he breathed.

Ste's mouth dropped as he turned, staring into Brendan's eyes. He felt the breath leave him as the first words were sung and he looked down at Brendan's out-stretched hand. He looked around to Amy and her face was similar to his. He nodded and took Brendan's hand, allowing him to lead him to the dance floor.

Brendan pulled Ste into him, wrapping a hand around Ste's waist and the other holding onto Ste's head as it rested on his chest. Ste gulped, trying to control his breathing, "Everyone is staring Brendan" he breathed.

Brendan nodded, his chin brushing the top of Ste's head, "I know Steven, but why shouldn't they".

They danced in silence as a few more couples decided to join them but, ultimately, people were to fascinated by the scene in front of them. Most people knew of the men's troubled past, knew of the argument that had happened in this very room only a month ago.

The song ended and Ste pulled back slightly, staring up to Brendan with tears in his eyes. He had always wanted something like this but Brendan had always been against it and the fact Brendan had remembered and made it happen well, the emotions were going wild inside him. Ste bit his lip as people started to leave the dance floor.

Brendan knew it was now or never and he bent his head down and placed a gentle but passionate kiss on the blonde haired boys lips. He had expected Ste to pull back so was shocked when Ste deepened the kiss. As they broke apart, people started applauding, warranting laughs from the two men. Brendan took hold of Ste's hand and tried to pull him towards the office. Ste looked around at Amy who nodded in approval and he followed Brendan, allowing the older man to close the door behind them.

"I love you Steven" Brendan whispered. He had let go of Ste's hand and was now sat on the edge of the table. He had a whole speech planned for this moment but he had made a last moment decision just to say the most important thing. He waited for a response from Ste but, when none came, he continued, "I have loved you for far too long now. I want to give you everything you want and more. I want to make you happy. I want to have what we used to have only better this time. I want us to have out happy ending".

Ste felt the tears sting his eyes and he looked up to Brendan, blinking to let them fall. He nodded at Brendan, "It's all I've ever wanted Brendan" he breathed, his voice breaking, "You are all I've ever wanted and that has never changed".

Brendan moved so he was in front of Ste and he placed a hand under Ste's chin, "Then why don't we try again?" he asked, his voice sounding almost desperate, "Why don't we start anew?".

Ste nodded, the smile on his face proving these were happy tears, tears that he wouldn't be able to hold in no matter how hard he tried. He gulped, and wiped his face on his sleeve as he went up onto tip toes, "I'm going to kiss you now" he said in answer before forcing his lips onto the others. This kiss released everything that had lost in the past ten years, this kiss was so passionate that they struggled for breath as they pulled away. This kiss was a sign of things to come and both men knew that they were finally back on track.

Brendan took Ste's hand and pointed to the door, "We go out there, hand in hand and show they world that we are serious this time. We prove to all of them that, no matter how hard it has been, all that is gone".

Ste nodded and placed his hand on the door handle, opening it slowly and turning to Brendan, "You take the lead" he breathed. Brendan simply nodded in response, kissed Ste on the top of the head and led them both back into the same crowded club, the only difference being how the air seemed lighter now.


	13. Wasted Time

**Author Note: Well, this is extremely long overdue and I can only apologize for that... Especially to the readers who were there with me every day. Needless to say, I took a break due to suffering with depression and I finally feel ready enough to try again. I am going to perform a slight time jump but I hope to keep the story going smoothly. Thank you for your patience. **

Steven Hay could admit that the Christmas of 2013 was probably his best one yet. He had gotten to spend the whole day with Brendan Brady. Gotten to start their future at the most magical time of the year and for Ste, it had been absolutely magical.

He'd woken up in the arms of the man he loved on Christmas morning and every day before that since the Christmas party at Chez Chez.

Ste had practically moved into Brendan's since they had reconciled their relationship but he didn't want to sell the flat so soon into the relationship. Which is why, on New Year's Eve, he had decided to head back to the flat to check everything was OK.

He'd got out of bed, kissed Brendan on the cheek, explained where he was going and how he would meet Brendan at the club later to set up for the party and then quickly got dressed and headed out the door.

Once he was out of the cold December air he took a deep breath and smiled. He was finally happy with his life. Yes, he had wished things had been different. For a start he wished he hadn't have lost ten years for crimes that Brendan hadn't actually committed but he was back now and they were going to be in this for the long haul.

He managed to get back to the flat without being stopped by many people for what he would consider mind-numbing pre-new years chat but, when he got back to the flat, he froze. There was someone stood at his door, someone with jet black hair. He gulped back the lump in his throat and stepped towards the door, clearing his throat.

"Hey Jed" he called out. The man turned around and Ste felt like he had been hit in the stomach. Jed's lip was bleeding and his eye looked black. He ran forward, embracing the man when he reached him.

"What the hell happened to you?" he asked, concern present in his voice.

Jed gulped, biting his bleeding lip, "I was on my way home from a friend's this morning and someone jumped me. They took my wallet and I had no cash and I knew you lived closer then my mum so I swung by hoping you would be here".

Ste sighed and nodded, giving a weak smiled before he opened the door and took Jed's hand, leading him inside.

The first thing Ste did was make them both a cup of tea and then he went to the lounge, looking down at Jed sat on the sofa as he handed him his cup.

Jed accepted the cup and gave a small smile. The bleeding had subsided slightly but the blackness around his eye was only getting worse. Ste had brought him an ice pack but he left it on the table, he didn't like the cold. He looked up at Ste and smiled again, "How have you been Ste?" he asked gently.

Ste bit his lip as he looked to the floor. He didn't know whether he should tell Jed that him Brendan were back together. He felt bad for the guy. He shrugged his shoulders, "I've been OK" he breathed, "I finally have my life back on track".

Jed scoffed and nodded, "And here I sit, beaten up and bloody".

Ste moved to sit next to him and placed a hand on his knee, "You'll get better from this. You always were strong".

Jed turned to face Ste, the hand on his knee feeling warm and comforting. He smiled at him, a genuine smile, "Ever think about me?" he asked in barely a whisper.

Ste gulped again but he had to be honest now, "No" he breathed out, "I haven't really had time to think about much. It's been a complete whirlwind since you left".

Jed bit the inside of his cheek, feeling a little hurt. He had thought about Ste a lot since they had broken up and to know that Ste hadn't thought about him at all, it wounded him. He looked around for anything to distract him and then he noticed how clean the place was. He turned back, "You haven't been living here have you?" he asked.

Ste's eyes widened at the question. He raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean? It's my flat, of course I have".

Jed shook his head and scoffed again, "It's too clean. I mean, not a thing is out of place. Where have you been living?".

Ste sighed and nodded to himself, "I've been living with Brendan".

Jed felt like he had been punched in the stomach and he stood quickly, looking for somewhere to place the mug. He needed to get out of this flat. He shook his head, "I didn't realise you would be living with him so quickly. I mean, when we were together it took you at least a year to agree to me moving in and then another three months to actually let me".

Ste stood with him and walked to the TV, putting his mug down on the TV unit and laughing, "That's because me and Brendan are different right. That's because me and Brendan were never truly over, we were just apart for ten years".

Jed bit his lip hard, causing it to bleed again. He walked to the kitchen, ditched the mug and headed for the door, "I can't believe I actually loved you. I can't believe I wasted so much of my life loving you. I hate you right now Ste" and he left, slamming the door hard behind him.

It had taken Ste most of the day before he had mustered the energy to go to the club. He had left the flat at 4pm and arrived at the club just after 5, his emotions running high. The words that Jed had said had hurt him deeply. He had loved Jed and to hear that Jed thought their relationship had been a complete waste of time, it had hurt him.

When he walked in, he was greeted by Brendan hurrying over and kissing him, wrapping his arms around him. The club was hectic, people running around, hurrying to get the place ready for the party that night. They only had two hours before the doors opened to the guests and only three quarters of the work seemed to have been done.

When Brendan let him go, he gave a small weak smile and instantly Brendan had guessed something was wrong. He stepped backwards and tilted his head to the side, "Are you OK Steven?" he asked, "You look white as a ghost".

Ste shook his head as the tears beaded on his eyelids. He bit his lip and walked over to the coach in the club and sat down, resting his elbow on his knees as he stared the floor. Brendan had followed him and was knelt in front of him before he could even say his name. He sighed, "I saw Jed today Brendan" he breathed.

Brendan was slightly taken aback but nodded and placed his hands on Ste's legs, "Where did you see him? What happened?"

Ste looked up and stared into Brendan's eyes, "He was outside my flat this morning. He'd been beaten up so I invited him in to check he was OK". Ste had to pause, he had been trying to help Jed and had been thanked with insults and abuse. He nodded to himself, willing himself to tell Brendan the rest of the story, "He realised that I hadn't been staying there and asked who I was staying with. I told him the truth and it really upset him and he stormed out, telling me that he had wasted his time on our relationship".

Brendan sighed, "He doesn't matter any more Steven" he breathed, leaning upwards and bringing Ste's head down onto his shoulder, "He's an idiot and he didn't ever deserve you if he feels that way".

Ste nodded at Brendan, wiping his tears on Brendan's shirt. They cuddled for a moment before Brendan told Ste to go home and get ready and to meet him back at the club when the party started. Ste agreed and left quickly so no one else would see his red puffy eyes.

It was 8pm when Ste was finally ready to go to the party. He had arranged to meet Tony outside his place and they would head in together. When the rounded the corner, the party was already in full flow and people were actually queuing to get in. They laughed about the line and walked straight past, onto the fire escape stairs and up into the club.

Inside, the club was booming. Loud music was playing and people were shouting to each other, trying to hear what their friends were saying. Most of the people inside were people who lived in Hollyoaks and they had been invited as VIP so they were spared the queuing but Ste had noticed some other guests had been allowed in. It made him smile, seeing the club so busy.

He finally made it to the front of the queue at the bar to be greeted by Brendan and his smile widened. Brendan lent across the counter to kiss him and then grabbed him a beer from the fridge, "You aren't working all night are you?" he shouted over to the moustached man.

Brendan shook his head, "I was just putting some more drinks in the fridge and then I was coming to join the party. Why don't you go see Amy and Ally until I can join you?".

Ste nodded and smiled and turned away from the bar and that's when he saw him... Jed was sitting with a group of his friends from the hospital...

**Author Note: I hope this was OK... I have big plans but I have to do some chapters like this to give Stendan a bit more of a story. I also apologize that this isn't very long.**


	14. Happy' New Year

**Author Note:** Thank you so much for returning back to the story. I never intended to take a break but life got too much and I'm just so glad some of you stuck with me. Thank you and it means a lot.

I have decided, seeing as he is an OC, this story may not be too Jed friendly from here on out... I mean, everyone loves a villain. That said, I might get half way through and change my mind.

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

It was almost like Ste was frozen to the spot. Why did Jed have to be here tonight? He took a deep breath and tried to make his way over to Amy but she had sensed something was wrong and had come over to him, "You OK Ste?" she asked, shouting over the volume of the music.

Ste shook his head and pointed in Jed's direction, "Jed's over there and me and him had a fight this morning".

Amy followed Ste's point and she gasped, "What happened to his face? Did you do that?".

Ste's mouth dropped open at the accusation, "Of course I didn't do it" he hissed, "He was beat up when I saw him".

Amy apologized quickly and grabbed Ste's hand, dragging him over to her table. She sat him down and explained to Ally what was going on before convincing him to not to go and kick him out. She then handed Ste his drink and disappeared.

Her first thought was to speak to Jed herself but she was sure that Ste wouldn't appreciate that so she made her way over to the bar, looking for Brendan. He was still stocking up fridges when she called him. He turned and smiled at her, "What can I get for you Amy?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Jed's here" she said simply. She still hated Brendan for what he did to Ste but she was trying to tolerate him now. She shrugged her shoulders, "And it's made Ste feel really uncomfortable so can you come and speak to him please".

Brendan sighed and called Rhys over, "I'm going out to the party, think you can run the place for a bit".

Rhys smirked at Brendan and nodded, he liked the idea of being in charge. Once Rhys had accepted, Brendan left the bar and made his way over to Ste.

As soon as he could, he wrapped his arms around him and hugged him, pressing Ste's head into his chest, "If you want me to kick him out I can" Brendan offered.

Ste shook his head, "I just don't understand why he is here. Common sense would say I was going to be here tonight".

Brendan nodded, gently kissing the top of Ste's head, "He won't cause trouble. He knows me and you are an item and he knows I own this place, he isn't likely to cause you any bother".

Ste nodded in agreement and pulled his head back, "I love you" he said simply and the kiss he received in return told him Brendan felt the same.

The clock was fast approaching midnight and, with fifteen minutes to go, people were starting to gather around, ready for the bells to start ringing. Brendan had switched all the televisions on, ready for the countdown and the atmosphere was buzzing. As the countdown begun, a circle was formed and everyone cheered as the clock struck twelve, bringing them into the new year. Everyone turned to the person stood next to them and gave them a kiss before they sang the obligatory 'Auld Lang Syne'.

After the crowd dispersed to say 'Happy New Year' to whoever they could get their hands on, Brendan and Ste were left, holding each other's hand and kissing each other in the middle of the dance floor. When they broke apart, Amy stole Ste away and Brendan went to speak to his bar staff.

Ste had decided that he needed to get some air. All the people hugging him had made him hot and he needed to just cool down before he felt ill. He headed out of the balcony and down the stairs into the courtyard. Once there, he withdrew his phone from his pocket and stared down at the screen, a picture of Brendan and himself lit by the glow. He was about to go through his contact list when the phone was knocked out of his hands, "Trying to rub it in were you?" he heard a familiar voice say.

Ste rolled his eyes and bent forward, picking his phone back up, "Jed, just leave me alone" he said, his voice low. He didn't want a scene to start and Jed was really drunk, he couldn't even stand still.

Jed shook his head, "You were all up there, kissing him right in the middle of that dance floor and you knew I was there".

Ste nodded, "Yes, I knew you were there but you were stupid to come to my boyfriend's club on New Year's Eve if you didn't want to see us kiss".

It was almost like Jed saw red and he shoved Ste, sending him flying to the floor. Ste had had quite a bit to drink himself and he wasn't able to catch himself before his head hit the concrete and his phone went flying away from him.

Ste tried to shake his head but the pain was intense and his vision was slightly blurry. "You are so pathetic Ste" Jed shouted, walking towards him, "Always getting yourself hurt, it's pathetic".

Ste was getting worried. Jed was really drunk and he obviously hadn't realised he had hurt him. He used his hands to shuffle away from him until he was backed up against the wall and with all his energy, he shouted, "Get away from me Jed".

Ally had been about to head outside when he heard raised voices from the courtyard. He stepped out and looked over the railing and saw the scene. Before he went down, he leant back into the building and told Amy to get Brendan. Then he ran down the stairs and grabbed hold of Jed, pulling him away from Ste as he thrashed against him.

By this point, people were starting to crowd onto the balcony and Brendan had to push past people to see what was going on. When he got to the top of the stairs he instantly zoned in on Ally holding Jed back and then looked at where Jed was shouting and saw Ste laying on the floor, holding his head. He ran as fast as he could, shouting at Amy to call the police and an ambulance.

When he got to Ste, he knelt next to him, "Steven are you OK?" he asked, panicked.

Ste smiled up at him, "I feel a bit woozy but it's only a bang to the head".

Brendan nodded and asked to feel the area. It felt wet and he panicked more, "Steven, your head is bleeding".

Ste nodded, "I know Bren" he breathed, "Like I said, it's only a little bang".

Brendan gulped but nodded at him, he wanted to be strong for Ste, it's all he ever wanted.

The emergency services arrived about ten minutes after Amy called them and the police instantly bundled Jed into the car. One officer stayed to take statements, explaining that they would talk to Brendan and Ste when Ste had been seen at the hospital.

Brendan thanked the officer and climbed into the ambulance with Ste, taking a seat and holding Ste's hand as the paramedic covered up the wound.


	15. Resolutions and Honesty

**Author Note: So I really am determined to finish this story but it may be a bit slow. To be honest, things happened in this story as I was writing them and I never intended them too happen in my head so trying to work out what is going to happen now. **

I think my only option is too write this chapter and do another time skip... It'll be about a year, if everyone is OK with that?

**Samia**, je vous remercie beaucoup pour vos gentils mots sur chaque chapitre et désolé, je suis un écrivain terribles ... Cette histoire est encore dans mon esprit et je dois constamment des idées, mais comme je l'ai dit ci-dessus, cette histoire a pris une tournure différente sur papier. Par exemple, Doug n'a jamais été censé être mort dans cette histoire et quand je publiais cela, il a beaucoup changé le plan. Je promets de mettre à jour autant que je peux et je vous remercie pour vos paroles. Je espère que vous aimez ce que je prévois de faire avec ce que je dois quelques torsions en magasin.

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Brendan didn't let go of Ste's hand the whole time he was in the ambulance. The paramedics were concerned about the cut on the back of Ste's head and the fact that he seemed very sleepy and out of it.

When they got him into hospital, a doctor saw him right away and declared he would need stitches and observation as the alcohol consumption mixed with the head injury could pose a risk of loss of consciousness. Brendan nodded along, one eye on Ste the whole time.

When the doctor left, he stood up and held Ste's head to his chest, kissing him gently as he slipped in and out sleep. He couldn't understand why Jed would do this? Why would Jed want to cause Ste so much pain?

When the doctor came back to perform the stitches, Brendan decided to leave the room. He'd needed this treatment one to many times and he knew how painful it was and he couldn't bare to see Ste in so much pain.

He wandered down to the entrance and took a seat on a bench outside. For New Year's Eve, the hospital was rather quiet. Brendan thought back on the past month. He had thoroughly enjoyed Christmas, spending it with the only man he had ever loved. Brendan's love for Ste had never changed, even when he was in prison, he constantly thought about him. His eyes welled up with hot tears as he thought about Ste and everything the young blonde boy meant to him.

Brendan looked at his watch and noticed that twenty minutes had passed since he had left. He stood up, grabbed the cross hanging around his neck and sighed, "I promise, I'm never going back to my old ways" he said to the cross which was now against his lips, "My new year's resolution is to love Steven unconditionally, forever and always". He kissed the cross once more and entered back into the hospital, returning to the wounded boys bedside.

It was 6am when the doctor decided Ste was allowed to go home as long as Brendan kept an eye on him. Brendan took the medication from the doctor, signed the discharge letter and helped Ste up, taking his hand and leading him outside. They found an empty taxi and jumped in, neither man fancying the walk back to the village.

When they got back, the village was dead. Not a single person was out and even Price Slice was still in darkness. Brendan could only guess it was because people had had such a heavy night but in a way he was glad. It meant he could Ste home without any questions.

When they got into the house, Brendan ushered Ste straight to the bedroom and, no sooner had Ste's head hit the bed, he was asleep. Brendan settled down onto the bed beside him and wrapped an arm around him, holding him close and never wanting to let go.

It was early afternoon when Ste finally woke up. His head was throbbing and the light pouring in from the window was not helping. He rolled onto his side and came face to face with Brendan, who was still sleeping. He gently tapped him on the shoulder and smiled when his eyes opened, "Hey you" he whispered.

Brendan smiled and shook his head. He rolled over onto his back and spread his arm behind Ste so they could cuddle for a bit, "How are you feeling?" he asked, his accent thick.

Ste shrugged his shoulders, "My head really hurts and I'm angry about what Jed did but every cloud has a silver lining".

Brendan cocked his head to the side and yawned, "Really? What's that this time?".

"Well, I saw just how much you have changed last night" he breathed, "Old you would have gone after Jed and probably tried to kill him but, you only had eyes for me".

Brendan nodded to himself, it was true. Old Brendan would have inflicted serious injury on Jed but now, he just wanted to make sure Ste was okay. He sighed, "I guess prison changes you and how you react and feel. When I saw you laying on the ground, I just had to get to you..." and he trailed of as he ran stroked the side of Ste's face.

"Did you think about me in prison?" Ste asked bravely.

Brendan was shocked by the question. Since they had been back together, Ste had never mentioned prison and too be honest, he was glad as he didn't want to talk about it. He bit his lip and nodded to himself again, he just wanted to be honest... "I didn't stop thinking about you in prison" he breathed, "Everyday that passed by I would think about what you were doing and as the years went by, I wondered if you had changed".

Ste nodded, "I always thought of you too, you know, at the hard parts". He shifted, moving a pillow so he could sit up and rest his head against the now-cushioned headboard, "But I especially thought of you when I was diagnosed with HIV. I thought of how disappointed you would have been and it broke me. When I was cured, with this miracle cure they found, it was you I wanted to tell".

Brendan could feel tears building in his eyes and he battled to keep them away, "It was really hard being locked up and not knowing what was happening that even the beatings did bother me".

Ste's face dropped as he heard the last words of Brendan's sentence. He reached his hand down to grab Brendan's, "You were beaten up?".

Brendan dropped his head, he had never intended to relive the days he spent in that concrete hell but he also never intended to lie to Ste or leave him guessing. He stared at their interlocked hands, "When I first got their, people feared me. I was accused of murder and people thought that is what I was capable of but, I let someone in and they told the "Top Dog" that I was nothing but a broken man..." Brendan paused, taking a shaky breath as he remembered the betrayal. "It was about a year after I got there that three of them jumped me in laundry room".

Ste bit down on his lip, stroking his thumb over Brendan's hand, "Was you badly hurt?".

"That time I got myself a seven day stay in the hospital wing followed by a seven day stay in solitary confinement for my own protection". Brendan gave Ste a small smile, but it quickly faded as he resumed his story... "After that, they would just use me for a punch bag whenever they got bored. Luckily, after about three years, an officer found out and he was shipped out. Without him, they were weak and allow I didn't go after revenge they never touched me again".

Ste gulped, salty tears running down his cheeks, "You didn't deserve any of that Brendan. I'm just so glad it stopped and you got out alive".

Brendan nodded and kissed the side of Ste's head, "Should we get up an go for something to eat?"

Ste nodded and smiled, "Thank you" he breathed as he sat upright, swinging his legs over the bed.

"For what?" Brendan asked as he mimicked Ste's action.

"For your honesty" Ste said simply, turning to smile at Brendan, a look of complete love and adoration plastered across his face.

**A/N: OK, so the next chapter will be a time skip again. From here, I literally have nothing so I'm time-hopping to get the story back on track. Hope that is OK with you all.**


	16. It's Going Good

**Author Note:** I was on the train home from London when the start of this chapter came into my head and I just knew I had to write another chapter. Is it a time skip but I hope you all like it. This chapter took me about 9 hours to write...

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Almost a year had passed since New Years and barring Ste's recovery from the injuries he had received, Brendan and Ste's life had been rather ordinary. They were a real couple and the past year had been full of doing things as an ordinary couple would. They went for dinner, they cooked meals, they kissed, cuddled and had sex, everything a normal couple would do. Ste had finally sold the flat in February and, although it had been hard because a good deal of his life had spent there, he had felt he was ready to move in with Brendan completely. It wasn't till the anniversary of their relationship was approaching that their life got even more interesting.

Brendan had been working all day and, knowing that it was normally a quiet evening, he had asked Rhys if he would run the place for him. Since opening again, Rhys had become a real asset for Brendan and as a reward, Brendan had slightly increased his pay and allowed him to have management shifts.

Rhys always jumped at the chance to run the club so Brendan sent a text to Ste saying he would be home by six and then they could either order takeaway or go out for dinner. He then proceeded to read through some figures and his mouth dropped open; Chez Chez was doing extremely well. Brendan assumed it was because he had started opening all day, everyday and allowing children in, becoming more of a pub then a club. He still had rules and, with exception of special occasions, children had to leave by 9pm so the building could become a nightclub again. This approach had helped many of the villagers out when they had nothing to do with the kids and had massively improved the amount of time Ste got to see his kids. Although Leah was seventeen and Lucas was fifteen they loved spending time at their dad's work and bringing their friends on the weekends. In fact, Leah loved it that much, she had already planned her 18th birthday party to be at the club.

It was half past five when Rhys turned up and Brendan handed over to him. He thanked him for covering, said goodbye to some of the people who had been in for the afternoon and left, stopping at the shop to get some beer before he went back to the house. When he got home he found Ste, wrapped up in a blanket on the sofa, curtains closed and the TV flickering away in the darkness of the room. He smiled at him and closed the door gently, removing his blazer and shoes before heading to the kitchen to put the beers in the fridge. He didn't like to wake Ste up when he was napping, he just seemed too peaceful. Instead he headed into the bathroom to get a shower.

By the time he was washed and dressed, Ste had woken up and was sat up on the sofa, his eyes glued to the television. Brendan smirked as he walked towards him, grabbing his shoulders, "Hey you" he shouted in Ste's ear.

Ste jumped out of the chair, "Brendan! Don't do that, you scared the life out of me!"

Brendan laughed and moved around to sit on the sofa, "Sorry, I've been extremely bored whilst you were in the land of nod".

Ste yawned and nodded, "I even told myself not to get too comfortable because you were going to be home early but then I snuggled under this..." and he lifted the blanket up, "...and I must have just drifted off".

"You don't need to explain yourself to me Stephen" Brendan chuckled, amusement lacing the features of his face, "Just go and get dressed and we can go out for a meal if you like". Ste nodded enthusiastically and hurried off, leaving Brendan with the remote control and about half an hour to kill.

Originally, they were just going to go to The Dog but, Brendan had decided that, after having had reviewed the figures at work, he wanted to really treat Ste. They hopped into a cab and travelled into Chester. Brendan had opted for a classy restaurant which supposedly sold the best steak in town.

When they entered, Ste's mouth dropped open. The place was beautiful with high ceilings and marble floors. They approached a pedestal which instructed you to wait for seating and smiled at the staff member, "We'd like a table for two please" he said, a little too excitedly.

Brendan smiled at the younger man and took his hand, gripping it tightly. Ste bit his lip and looked up at Brendan, "Sorry".

The lady behind the pedestal lead them to a small secluded table, perfect for a couple on date night. She handed them a menu each and smiled, "Your waiter will be with you shortly" and she left.

Ste looked around the room again, "Are you sure we can even afford to eat here? I mean look at it" and he gestured around the room.

"Of course I'm sure otherwise I wouldn't have brought us here" Brendan beamed, taking Ste's hand and holding it from across the table, "I looked at the figures today and the club is doing really well so I thought we deserved a treat".

"Do you reckon it's because you started letting kids in during the day?" Ste asked, generally curious.

"I think that has a lot to do with it. I mean, with the pool table, dart board, jukebox and cheap drinks, we provide families with a good afternoon. The only thing we are missing is a kitchen and the ability to serve food".

Ste's ear pricked up, "You want to be able to serve food?"

Brendan nodded, stroking his thumb over Ste's hand, "Of course I would like to and I've been looking at the money to see if we can afford to have a kitchen built in which, if you wanted to, you could run".

Ste nodded, a smile spread all across his face, "I would love that, if we could do it. Like it would be amazing but I think it should be kept to daytime hours only".

Brendan laughed and was about to reply when a waiter came over and introduced himself. They requested their food and drinks after a quick look at the menu and, after the waiter walked away, rejoined hands and continued discussing the businesses future.

The end of the night arrived quickly and feeling very full and satisfied, Brendan and Ste headed back home. Once in, they flopped down on the sofa, facing each other and staring into each others eyes. Brendan brought his hand to Ste's cheek and gently kissed him, running his tongue along Ste's lip, begging so entry. Ste parted his lips and allowed Brendan's tongue to explore his mouth. As the kiss was starting to deepen the were disrupted by a knock on the door.

Brendan sighed and let out a moan before pulling apart from Ste and standing up, kissing Ste quickly again. He smiled at Ste and headed for the door pulling it open. His mouth dropped and he was rendered speechless, staring at the two people standing on the doorstep. He took a deep breath, blinked back the tears building in his eyes and asked, "What are you two doing here?".


	17. Considered Perfect

**Author Note:** Hey everyone! Not much to say here but thank you too the reviewers for the comments. Have another chapter :) This one is just a nice quick update as it's my birthday on Sunday and I won't be doing another update until my next day off work!

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

_Brendan sighed and let out a moan before pulling apart from Ste and standing up, kissing Ste quickly again. He smiled at Ste and headed for the door pulling it open. His mouth dropped and he was rendered speechless, staring at the two people standing on the doorstep. He took a deep breath, blinked back the tears building in his eyes and asked, "What are you two doing here?"._

Declan and Padraig stared back at their father, a smile spread across each of their faces. They were so happy to see their father again. Declan bit his lip and laughed at his father's shocked face, "We thought we'd come over and say hello" he said, his accent even stronger then his fathers.

Brendan nodded and stepped forward, pulling both of the boys in for a hug, his tears finally escaping. He didn't think he would ever see his children again, not after he had been in prison for ten years. He hugged them for what felt like a lifetime, mainly to check that they were real and that they were actually standing in front of him. When he withdrew, he stepped back into the house, allowing the boys to follow him whilst he turned to Ste, his face wet with tears.

"Are you OK Bren?" Ste asked, an amused look on his face but then his own mouth dropped when he saw Declan and Padraig. He almost didn't recognize them, they had changed over the years but he knew Brendan wouldn't react this way over anyone else.

Declan raised his eyebrow at Ste, "You're here late?"

"Ste lives here Declan" Brendan answered simply, before Ste could say anything.

"Are you two like official now then?" Declan asked.

Brendan gave a small laugh and nodded, "It's out one year anniversary in a week".

Declan couldn't have smiled wider but Padraig looked confused. He cocked his head to the side, "What's going on? Do you know this guy Declan?".

"Padraig, you know dad is gay so this really shouldn't be a shock to you", Declan explained, turning his attention to his younger brother. When Declan had gone home after the last visit all those years ago, he had watched his mother tell Padraig the truth, in what he assumed was an attempt to turn the younger boy against him. He sighed and smiled, "This is Ste and him and dad used to be together before dad went to prison".

Padraig stepped forward and offered Ste his hand, which Ste accepted and shook firmly, "I'm Padraig, the son you haven't met yet" he said, in way of an introduction.

Brendan watched the scene, pride filling him. He took a deep breath before asking, "Do either of you want a drink?".

Both boys nodded and unison said, "Beer".

Brendan found that the word made him laugh. He forgot that his little boys weren't so little any more. Declan was twenty-two now and Padraig was nineteen. It saddened him knowing he had missed so much of their life, especially as it was mainly because he has been serving time for crimes he hadn't committed. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed four beers, opening them all and then carrying them back to the living room. He handed them out and everyone took a seat before Brendan asked, "So, why are you here and more importantly, does your mother know you're here?".

Padraig started playing with the bottle and Declan bit his lip, looking down at the floor, neither in a rush to speak. Brendan took the silence as an excuse to answer the question for them, "So she doesn't know. Fine, I'll have to phone her".

Declan almost jumped out of his seat in a hurry to stop Brendan. The older man was taken aback by the action and tilted his head to the side, "Explain?".

Declan sighed and nodded, sitting back in his seat on the couch. He looked at Padraig for help but the younger lad was staring at his bottle. He nodded to himself before speaking, "We decided that, considering we are old enough, we could just come over and stay with you, you know, if that was OK with you?".

"And why would you want to stay with me?" Brendan asked, curiosity lacing his voice.

Declan thought before speaking and then decided to just go for it, "Mum's boyfriend is a complete nightmare. I mean, I moved out about a year ago and have been floating between hostel's in Dublin until I could get Padraig to come with me. Plus, mum kind of hates me now" he breathed.

Brendan leant forward, resting his elbows on his knees and tapping the glass of the bottle against his teeth, "Why does Eileen hate you?" he asked gently.

Declan felt the tears building in his eyes at the question. He hadn't been prepared to tell his father so soon. He sighed and gulped, trying to remove the lump in his throat, "I'm gay, dad".

Brendan scoffed and nodded, "Well, neither of us are going to judge you and I assume Padraig hasn't either?"

For the first time, Padraig looked up from his bottle and nodded, "When mum kicked him out, I told her what I thought about it and she basically said I had to keep my mouth shut or follow him out the door. I chose to keep quiet because I was scared but I'd always go and find Declan and make sure he had food and drink".

Brendan felt sadness hit him, "Why didn't you come a year ago?"

Declan shrugged his shoulders, "To be honest, I did think about it but I couldn't leave Padraig with them. Since the new boyfriend moved in with his kids, we were treated like unwanted objects. I wanted to have enough money to get us both here, not come alone".

Ste had been listening carefully and he decided to speak up, "You could have come and I would have helped you with the money to get Padraig here".

Brendan turned to look at Ste, a soft look on his face, "You would've helped my boys?" he asked.

Ste nodded, taking a swig of his beer, "I would have helped anyone who means something to you".

Declan smiled, his eyes wet with tears and he laughed, "Come on dad, no PDA's".

Everyone in the room laughed and the serious talk was over, for now. The conversation turned to catching up about how the boys had done in school and what they had been doing in the years since. Ste caught them up on his life since Brendan had left but Brendan kept quiet, he didn't think the boys were ready for prison talk.

When they had all finished their drinks, Ste spoke up, "OK then boys, go pick a room upstairs and remember, these rooms have got to last you a few years".

Both the younger boys beamed as they stood, collecting their luggage and heading upstairs. When they were gone, Brendan turned to Ste, "You're really OK with them living here?"

Ste nodded, a smile spread across his face, "Of course I'm OK with it. You let me have Leah and Lucas over all the time, why wouldn't I help you out?"

Brendan nodded at Ste and pulled him into a hug, holding him in the middle of the lounge and never wanting to let go.

The next morning, Ste had gotten up early in order to make some breakfast for the new house guests. He'd thrown together a small fry-up each and the smell must have woke them as they came downstairs right as it was done.

Brendan had been up for little over an hour and most of it had been consumed with a phone call to Eileen to explain that the boys had decided to live with him. She hadn't been best pleased that they had taken off in the night without a note but she sounded happy to 'get rid' of them, promising to swiftly mail their stuff over when she could.

After the phone call, Brendan joined the others at breakfast, "So, I've decided to have a the Christmas party at the club on the same night as our anniversary" he announced, shoving a piece of toast in his mouth as he fiddled with his blazer.

"Are you being serious? That's like six days away Brendan" Ste said, his eyes wide.

"Why not? It'll be easy to plan. The club's already decorated and I'm sure someone from the village will DJ. Just need to put some posters up, get a caterer and make sure everyone knows kids are invited to maximise the amount of people we have coming".

Ste shook his head and rolled his eyes, "Well, you can sort it all out then".

"Calm down Stephen, I've got a plan" the older guy said, standing up and finishing the toast hanging out of his mouth, "Which starts now so I'm going to go and see Rhys at the club and if you all want to swing by it a bit, then I'll see you soon".

Ste stood up himself, kissed Brendan on the cheek and saw him to the door, "I'll bring the boys over in a bit".

Brendan thanked him, gave him another kiss and headed off, ready for another day in what he now considered the perfect life.


	18. How Did You Remember?

**Author Note:** So, it has been a while and I can only apologize but I have had bronchitis, sinusitis, depression and stress relating to certain aspects of my life. On top of that, I am in a newly formed relationship and I have wanted to enjoy that for a while, so sorry to neglect you. Anyway, have an update and if WoW doesn't consume my life tomorrow, you may even get two!

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.**

Brendan had been in the club for little over three hours when Ste finally joined him, Declan and Padraig in tow. He smiled at their entry, grabbed four beers and dished them out before excusing himself to the office.

"The part causing you problems?" Ste asked, leaning against the door frame, a smug smile planted onto his face.

Brendan looked up and scoffed, "As if. I own a club Steven, hosting a party is as easy as eating cake".

Ste shook his head, "So why did I walk in to you with your head in your hands?" he asked, an eyebrow raised.

Brendan sighed and picked up a piece of paper, "This was given to me this morning..." he trailed, holding it out for Ste.

Ste took and read the letter slowly, making sure to not miss a word. It was a handwritten letter, from someone who clearly knew Brendan. Whilst reading, Ste was confused as to why it had bothered him and then he saw the signature. His mouth dropped and he stepped towards the older man, "It doesn't mean anything if you don't reply" he breathed.

Brendan looked up at Ste and nodded, "I'm not going to reply but I just can't believe she would write to me after all these years. I mean, where was she when I was in prison?"

"It's guilt that" Ste said, kissing Brendan's head, "She killed him and she probably couldn't face seeing you locked up when it should have been her".

Brendan let out a long sigh and nodded, before standing up and planting a kiss on Ste's lips. He pushed him backwards and smiled at him pressed up against the wall. He took the letter back from him and screwed it up, throwing it into the bin, "Only one place for something like that". He grabbed Ste's hand and walked back out the office, going to sit with his boys and enjoy some quality family time.

Throughout the week, Brendan had been preparing for the party and come of the morning of the big event, they were finally ready. He had woken early to get some breakfast cooked and then to make a call to finalize the DJ, who was more then happy to come at a reasonable cost. Ste joined shortly after the breakfast was finished and Brendan steered him straight to the table, pushing him into a chair with a breakfast worthy of a hotel in front of him, "Happy Anniversary Steven" he whispered into the blonde boy's ear before kissing his neck.

"Er, Dad, get a room" Padraig said from behind them as he descended the stairs. Brendan rolled his eyes and took a seat at the table, gesturing for his youngest to sit down and enjoy some breakfast.

"Wow, I hope I get this for my birthday" he laughed, grabbing a croissant and the jar of Nutella, "I mean, you've gone all out for your one year... Congratulations, by the way".

Both Ste and Brendan nodded in thanks and the three of them ate together before being joined by Declan, who was extremely unhappy to find that the best of it was gone. He sulked for a while whilst everyone else left and got ready for the day ahead.

After about ninety minutes, Ste, Declan and Padraig were dressed and decent and chilling out in the lounge, watching Saturday morning television and making comments about which people they liked and disliked.

It took Brendan an extra half an hour to be ready enough to join them and even then he didn't sit down, "OK, I have a plan" he declared, reaching into his wallet and pulling out a bundle of notes, "Each of you gets £200 and you have to go and buy an outfit for this evening's festivities".

Ste laughed before he realised Brendan wasn't joking, "Oh yeah and what about you?" he asked.

Brendan gave the fakest smile he could and held out the collar of his suit jacket, "I own at least twenty five suits, I don't need to buy anything to wear".

Declan shook his head, "I am not going out to buy a suit. I'm Declan Brady, not Brendan Brady".

"Then buy some nice jeans and a shirt" Brendan replied, rolling his eyes. Declan sighed but took the money and grabbed his jacket. Brendan stopped him and smiled, "Here's an extra fifty, get yourself a haircut".

Declan shook his head but laughed and took the extra money, "Come on Padraig, we'll let Brendan take Ste shopping", and both the boys put their shoes on and left the two lovers on their own.

As soon as the door was closed, Ste kissed Brendan deeply and passionately, "Good way to get rid of them" he smiled.

Brendan laughed and shook his head, "As much as I wish we could spend some quality time together, I really have got to go and sort the plans for tonight, otherwise I'll have to work tonight".

A disappointed look fell over Ste's face, "I understand" he smiled, "But spare me an extra five minutes, I have to go get you something" and he ran off to the bedroom.

Brendan sat down and waited patiently for Ste to return and was surprised to see a card and a small box in his hands, "Are they for me?".

Ste nodded, handing him them and smiling, "Don't worry about getting me anything, I just saw this the other day and it screamed out to me".

Brendan opened the card and kissed Ste when he saw the picture of them on the cover. He read it briefly and then placed it on the coffee table before turning his attention to the box. He pulled the lid off and his breath caught in his throat. He was staring at a silver bracelet chain with both their names engraved on it and the date that they first met each other. He bit his lip, "How did you even remember that date?" he asked, gulping hard to remove the lump in this throat.

Ste smiled and took the bracelet out of the box and placed it around Brendan's wrist, clasping it in place. He moved his hand down to hold Brendan's and smiled, "I found some paperwork of when the club first opened and with the help of everyone who was here at that point, we managed to work out the date you got to the village".

Ste suddenly found himself engulfed into a massive hug, his head pressed into Brendan's chest and he was sure the older man was crying. He hadn't expected a reaction like this and it was truly amazing. When they pulled apart, Brendan whispered, "I love you Steven".

"I love you too, Brendan Brady" Ste wished back, quickly kissing Brendan. He stood up and smiled, "I better go get myself some new clothes and a haircut" he laughed.

Brendan stood with him and walked him to the door. He was completely touched by the gift and he knew he wasn't ever going to take it off. He opened the door and kissed Ste once more, "I'll meet you at the club tonight" he said, their noses touching. They broke apart and Ste left, Brendan watching him down the street.

It was about nine in the evening when the club started to pick up. Children were running around, being shouted out by their parents and the young adults were already pretty buzzed. When Ste arrived, Brendan was leant against a banister with people surrounding him, congratulating him on the success of the party and thanking for taking the time to do it. As soon as Brendan saw the blonde hair he loved so much, he broke away from the crowd and smiled, "You got here late" he shouted over the music.

"Declan and Padraig were fighting over the bathroom and I thought punches were going to be thrown" he explained, warranting a laugh from the older man, "I told them to pack it in or they weren't coming at all".

"Look at you being a strict father" Brendan laughed. He had noticed that, in the short time the boys had been in the village, Ste had really taken them under his wing. It made his heart swell with pride and happiness. "Let's get you a drink" he whispered, guiding him over to the bar.

Once they had drinks they started to mingle with everyone. Ste chatted away with Amy and Ally for a while and gave both Lea and Lucas some money to buy themselves a drink with. Brendan stood at the bar with Padraig and Declan, watching the scene and answering their questions about the club. The queue outside was getting longer and longer and it seemed the whole of Chester had heard about the party. It was half past ten when Brendan decided to give a speech.

He moved to the middle of the club, signalled for the DJ to stop the music and waited till everyone was staring at him. He cleared his throat and began, "It's been over a year since I got back to this village and over a year since Che Chez reopened it's doors and started to service the public again. As many of you can tell, this club has come a long way and I do personally feel that allowing children and under eighteens was a great thing for this place". He took a breather, looking around the all the customers, "When I reopened this place, I never thought I would have queues at the door and I never thought I would be able to enjoy running this place with some of the greatest people at my side and that's what this speech is really all about". Brendan took an even deeper breath and turned to face Ste, using his finger to call him forward, "I never imagined I would get to spend a single Christmas party with this man at my side let alone spend this one celebrating our one year anniversary. I love this man with all my heart; a confession I would never had made a few years ago but I stand here today and I shout it from the rooftops because I couldn't be happier".

Ste was blushing and he could feel everyone's eyes staring at him, burning into him. He dipped his head, "What are you doing Brendan?" he asked, humour lacing his tone.

Brendan raised a hand to his own lips and whispered 'shush' at him before continuing, "Which is why I realised I have to do this..." and he dropped down to one knee, pulling a small square box out of his pocket. He opened it to reveal a platinum ring, diamonds embedded into it, "... Steven Hay, will you do me the honour of becoming my husband? Will you marry me?".

Ste's mouth had dropped opened and tears were already spilling down his cheeks. His hand came up to cover his mouth and he took a few deep breathes, the sound of his sobs echoing around the silent room. He looked down at Brendan, biting his lip before nodding and wiping his cheeks, "Of course I'll marry you" he said, moving towards Brendan and holding out a shaking hand and letting the love of his life place the ring on it.

"Thank you" Brendan whispered, a few silent tears rolling down his own cheek as he kissed Ste. At that point, the room exploded with applause and before they could revel in their new engagement, Ste was crowded by all the females that had been there for him the whole time.

Brendan laughed and moved backwards, allowing everyone who wanted a glance of the ring to surround Ste. He made his way over to the bar, random people congratulating him. At the bar Rhys, Tony, Ally, Declan and Padraig came over to him, clapping him on the back and ordering a round of drinks.

"Congratulations Dad" Declan said, beaming as he took a swig of his beer, "That was a perfect speech".

Brendan laughed and nodded, "I'm actually still shaking". He held out his hand and showed the lads how unsteady he was.

"That's crazy" Tony mocked, "It's not like Ste was going to say no, he loves the bones of off you".

Brendan nodded and smiled, his eyes trained on Ste who was still swarmed by all his female friends. He nodded and looked around at the five lads he was stood with, "He's perfect and now I get to spend the rest of my life with him".

**A/N: It's nearly 2am and after getting a photo that really angered me, I managed to finish this chapter... only took four hours! Hope you all enjoy!**


	19. Partners

A/N: OK, so now my shifts at work are back to normal and I am being treated like a human which wasn't happening before, I think I might be able to power out an update at least once a week but I won't promise as sometimes I have social commitments.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Hollyoak's or the characters in this story... Except Jed, he is my original character.

The run up to Christmas had been busy with everyone charging around trying to get the last of the Christmas shopping done and attending Christmas events in the village. Brendan had really been trying this year and, on top of running the club, he had managed to attend all but two of the events the villagers had held.

People were still congratulating him on his engagement, even on Christmas Eve when he had popped down to the store to get Ste, the boys and himself a few beers. For the first time, he has decided to close the club for two days, leaving him time to spend with his family and host the perfect Christmas Day dinner.

When he got back, the boys were fighting over the TV remote and Ste was shouting at them to pack it in. He leant against the doorway and shook his head, "Pack it in the both of you" he barked, walking over to them and taking the remote from them, "You are both adults and you need to stop fighting".

Declan rolled his eyes and pushed himself away from Padraig, sulking on the arm of the sofa. Brendan sighed and placed the beers on the table, "Can we please just have a few beers and enjoy each other's company?" he asked.

Padraig nodded and grabbed a drink, handing it to Declan. He sighed and gave his youngest brother a small smile, taking the drink and twisting the top of, taking a sip and nodding, "Sorry" he breathed.

Brendan laughed and grabbed himself and Ste a drink, pulling Ste onto the other sofa with him and changing the channel onto a top ten Christmas hits show. He wrapped his arms around the blonde haired man and smiled, "How'd I get so lucky?" he breathed.

Declan raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

"Well, I got given a second chance by this man in my arms and by you boys, when I probably didn't deserve them" Brendan explained.

Padraig shrugged his shoulders, "To be honest, you never did anything to upset me. I mean, yes I felt bad for Declan when he was kidnapped and I thought bad of you but then Mum started to show her true colours".

"I didn't hate you after what happened, it wasn't really your fault. You didn't ask that douche to kidnap me and I know how panicked you were when you found out he had, so I wanted to see that side of you, not the bad side" Declan added.

"And I think you've always known that I would always come back to you. Even if seeing you like that and hearing you tell me to leave hurt like hell, there was no way I wouldn't run straight back into your arms. I never stopped loving you" Ste finished, turning to face Brendan.

Brendan felt tears springing to his eyes and he blinked them away, "But I would have understood if all of you had have hated me for the rest of eternity. I mean" and he looked at Declan, "It was because of my antics you were kidnapped and I really am to blame for that".

Then he turned to Padraig, "The last time you saw me was when I turned up at the coach station and tried to give you money and your mother told me none of you were interested and I couldn't buy your love".

Finally he turned his head to Ste, "And you went through hell and back with me. As Declan knows, I used to beat you to a pulp and every time you still came back to me. Then you had your accident and I left you, because I couldn't see you like that and I told God I would go and finally, I went to prison and threw everything away".

"You cared enough to try and find me and you sent me home, you did the best you could" Declan smiled.

"I wanted the money, mum just wouldn't let me take it. I thought it was pretty cool that your dad could turn up and do that" Padraig laughed.

"Yeah I went through hell and back but that's because I tried to force you out of the closest before you were ready. Maybe you shouldn't have hit me but that is long behind us know and I love you unconditionally" Ste finished again. Then he raised his nearly empty bottle, "A toast, to the four of us and the perfect life we are going to have".

The four of them all finished the beers whilst talking about topics that were much cheerier. When the clock stuck midnight, they wished each other a Merry Christmas and then slowly made their way to bed, knowing that the next day was going to be busy and tiring.

Brendan was the first to wake up the following day and he immediately set about to work. He was expecting Amy, Ally, Tony, Leah, Lucas, Rhys, Jacqui and their fourteen year old daughter Holly for dinner at about 12pm and he wanted to make sure that everything was perfect.

Ste had felt the shift in the mattress and had woken up not long after Brendan. He got up and put some lounge pants on before going to join Brendan in the kitchen, "Are you seriously going to cook this yourself?" he asked, folding his arms across his chest.

Brendan looked up and bit his lip, "I wanted to but I haven't ever cooked for so many people before and I kind of want it to be perfect".

Ste nodded and laughed, "Well how about, you be the perfect host and I'll be the chef?"

"That sounds amazing" Brendan nodded, "I'm sure you can make this meal the best meal these guys have ever eaten".

Ste laughed, "I'm not sure about that but I'll make it edible and it'll be half decent".

It was around 9.30am when Declan and Padraig finally came downstairs, wrapped in their dressing gowns. As soon as they got there, Ste offered them a bacon roll and they gratefully accepted.

When the breakfast was done, they all ate together in the lounge and then Brendan stood up, "Who wants to open some presents?" he said, taking a seat on the floor next to the neatly wrapped gifts, "And remember, whatever you get, you thank the people who brought you it, even if you really don't like it".

Everyone laughed at the comment and then started making their ways through the gifts, Brendan handing them out one at a time. He read the label on each one and once they were through, each person had a sizeable pile next to them. It was then that Brendan pulled something from his waistband, "This is my final gift to you Steven" and he handed him a thick envelope. Ste took it, tilting his head out of curiosity and opening it gently.

Inside was a card with 'Merry Christmas Fiancé' written across the front. Ste nodded, biting his lip as he pulled it out and opened it. When the paper inside fell out, his mouth dropped and tears instantly pooled in his eyes. He shook his head, "Is this what I think it is?" he managed to stammer.

"Have a look" Brendan breathed back, moving to sit with him.

Ste quickly read the first page of the letter and the shock made him drop it again. It was a contract giving him half of Che Chez. He gulped and let his tears fall, "Brendan" he cried, "This is too much".

Brendan shook his head, "I want to be your partner in every way and that means business partners as well. I want to you to help make the decisions like you help me make mine".

Ste bit his lip hard and nodded, "Thank you so much" and he kissed Brendan, wrapping his arms around his neck.

Declan and Padraig both looked to each other and rolled their eyes, they had gotten used to the two of them kissing and this one was definitely warranted but they still hated watching.

When the older men broke apart, they apologized to the boys and then Brendan told everyone to take their stuff to their rooms so the house was ready for the arrival of their guests.

Ste hurried off, clutching the contract in his hand as he continued to wipe the tears from his face. He couldn't believe he would officially own half of the club. He put all his gifts on the bed and turned, heading back to the kitchen to continue preparing the dinner.

It was quarter past twelve when Amy and Ally turned up, Leah and Lucas in tow. They were welcomed into the house and given a drink within the first few minutes. Brendan invited them to sit in the lounge, kicking Declan and Padraig to the floor so Amy could sit down.

Ally had walked into the kitchen, "I see you're doing the dinner today then" he smiled.

"Yeah, I couldn't risk Brendan messing it up. It would have crushed him" Ste laughed.

They exchanged pleasantries until the doorbell went again and the remainder of the group arrived. Once they were all settled with a drink, Brendan called Ste out of the kitchen to open more presents and so he could watch Leah and Lucas open theirs.

Everyone was really thankful for what they had received and, once the mess had been cleared away, Brendan asked Declan and Padraig to help set the table. Leah and Lucas came along as well, under Amy's instructions and finally, at 2pm, they were all seated and the last of the dinner was brought out to them.

Ste quickly went and changed before joining them. Brendan had insisted on saying a prayer as he hadn't lost his faith and they all bowed their heads. After he finished, they all smiled and he added, "Tuck in" and everyone did just that.

After the main course had been eaten, Tony smiled and said, "So, considering you've been busy in the kitchen all day, what did you get for Christmas Ste?"

Ste smiled and looked over at Brendan, looking for permission to tell them all. When Brendan nodded he took a deep breath, "I got a watch, some clothes, some smellies and then Brendan gave me a huge present". He took Brendan's hand under the table and squeezed it, "He gave me a contract for half of Che Chez".

The table fell silent and mouth's dropped open, "Wow" Amy breathed, her knife dropping from her hand, "That's an amazing gift".

Brendan nodded, "Like I told him, I wanted him to be my partner in every sense of the word and that includes business".

Rhys nodded, "Awesome, now I get to have both of you as managers" he laughed.

Brendan looked at Ste and nodded again. They had been talking about Rhys' position within the club recently and they had made a decision which they think he would be happy with. Ste looked back to Rhys, "Actually, we were hoping you'd work with us, not for us".

Rhys raised an eyebrow, "How do you mean?"

"We want you to become a supervisor. You'll get your own keys, a better wage and the powers of a manager without being one".

Jacqui's jaw dropped and she looked at Rhys. He stared back at her and nodded his head, "Of course I'll be a supervisor, as long as I don't have to wear uniform any more".

Brendan laughed, "Well, you better use some of that Christmas money to buy a suit then".

Everyone laughed and continued to enjoy the day. In the evening, the usual Christmas day banter happened with games been played and singing joyful tunes whilst alcohol was being consumed. In the early evening, Ste had laid on a small buffet for them all to enjoy.

Brendan excused himself from the room at about 9pm and walked into the bedroom. He had drunk quite a bit so he sat down and grabbed an unopened card he'd hid in his draw. He'd received it a few days ago but he'd known the handwriting and it had angered him, so he had hidden it in the draw. He opened it slowly and sighed, "To Brendan, I hope you have a good Christmas. I understand you don't want to talk, so I'll leave you alone after this. Love from, Cheryl" he read aloud.

"You'd think she'd get the hint" Ste said from the doorway. He had gone to check everything was OK and wasn't expecting this.

"Yeah, but she seems to think I actually care about her and too be honest, I don't" he said sadly, putting the card in the bin next to the bed.

"Don't let something like that ruin your day" Ste said, walking towards him.

Brendan nodded, "It's been pretty perfect" he breathed, looking up to Ste, tears making his eyes twinkle.

"It really has and the night is still young, so dry them beautiful eyes and come and join us all again" Ste said, wiping the tears off of Brendan's cheek with the pad of his thumb.

Brendan nodded and stood up, kissing him passionately before leading him back to the door, "Let's go and see Christmas out with a bang" he smiled, dragging Ste back to the party.


	20. Blazes

**A/N: **I am so sorry about my absence of over a year and I understand if any one is angry or does not want to read my story any more. Thing is, I have been trying to overcome some issues with my personal life and, when I thought I was back on track, in June last year, my grandmother passed away and I lost my best friend. I'm still not fully recovered from all this but since then, I have been having all sorts of treatment to get me back on track and that is what has held me back and for that I can only apologize.

**If you skipped the above, please read this. **After some decision and thought, I have decided that one detail in this story will be changed to make the rest of the story possible. You will notice it when it happens and you will probably point it out to me, but it is a change I am making and to be perfectly honest with you, it's been so long I don't have the document ready for editing any more. This is the final time skip... It gets me back on track... If there is more, it'll be about a month.

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Anyway, **DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hollyoaks or any of the characters in this story... except Jed!**

Christmas was over and the New Year had come and gone, all with equal amounts of celebration. In fact, by April 2015 every thing seemed to be going pretty perfectly. Cheryl hadn't been in touch again, Padraig and Declan were still living with Brendan and Ste with very little interference from Eileen and Amy was letting Leah and Lucas stay with their dad as much as they wanted, even with Brendan around.

Ste had thrown himself into wedding planning and Brendan had insisted that anything he wanted he would have, no matter the cost. Upon hearing this, Leah had instantly dragged Ste shopping for ideas for the prettiest dresses because he didn't have a choice about not including her. Amy had insisted that she help Ste as well, ensuring that everything he wanted was the best.

It was mid April when everything came crashing down around Ste and the wedding plans were put on hold indefinitely.

Leah was just turning eighteen which meant all the attitude of becoming an adult was finally starting to show. She had attended many parties at the club as her friends enjoyed their new found adulthood and she couldn't wait for the day it was her turn.

It was a Friday night when she went to get ready at a friends house. They were all chatting and drinking before heading to the booked party at the club. Leah was revelling in all of her friends adoration for the fact that her stepdad owned the 'hottest' place to party for miles.

Brendan had been setting up for the girls when he heard someone shouting from the street below. He ran out to the balcony, the shouting getting louder, "Call for help".

He ran down the stairs to find a young girl, all dressed up screaming, "Help, there's been a fire! They're all stuck" she bellowed at him, tears streaming down her face.

Brendan's eyes widened and he forced his phone into her hands, he didn't need telling where the fire was, the feeling in his gut told him where to go. As he ran, he could see some flickering lights and the closer he got the brighter they got. He ran faster than he had ever run before and then he saw it, it was the house that Leah was in. Adrenaline kicked in and he knew he couldn't wait for the fire services so he ran, straight into the blazing inferno.

Inside it was smoky but the fire hadn't yet made it downstairs. He proceeded with caution, concerned the the roof may collapse at any point. He followed the sound of the screaming, finding it reassuring. All the while he could hear screaming people were alive.

As he reached the top of the stairs, he could yelled, "If you are in here and can get through follow my voice".

"Brendan, is that you?" Leah called back, her words broken by sobs.

At this, Brendan moved to the doorway where her voice had come from and he could see her, pressed against a wall, in one of the only places the fire hadn't reached. It was now he thanked God for large rooms and the fact that the girl in the street had screamed so quickly, "Try and walk towards me Leah, keeping close to the walls".

Leah nodded to the instructions and started tiptoeing along the wall, the door getting closer to her as she did so, "It's so hot Brendan, I'm scared".

Brendan nodded, the heat was making him sweat profusely but he couldn't give up on the girls, "Who else is in there with you Leah?" he asked, his voice getting louder as the flames started to spread.

"Ella, Jess and Mia but Ella and Mia are behind me" she replied and both girls shouted to let them Brendan know they were coming out.

"Where is Jess?"

"She was the other side of the room when it happened and we couldn't see her through the flames" Leah replied again and as she finished she'd reached the door and fell onto Brendan, clutching him as she did, sobbing into his shirt.

Brendan sighed, "OK Leah, you three need to go downstairs and get yourself checked out, I'm going to try and find Jess". Leah nodded, biting her lip. She didn't want to go without Brendan but she didn't want Jess to die either.

The street was crowded with on lookers who had been informed of what had happened. Amongst them were the parents of the five girls who had been getting ready at the house, which belonged to Jess. He parents were devastated that it could have been their fault, even though the other parents weren't blaming them.

As soon as the girls got through the door, paramedics were pulling them to ambulances and treating them. All the parents rushed to them, wanting to make sure that their girls were OK.

It seemed like an eternity when Jess finally came stumbling out of the building. Brendan had managed to get into the room, his shirt pulled over him, protecting him from some of the flames. As she had got outside the door, she had collapsed, all her energy gone into getting away from the inferno. Her parents followed her into an ambulance and they went straight of to the hospital.

It was only seconds later that the onlookers heard the crash as the roof above gave out and the flames roared away into the night sky. The firefighters all ready tackling the blaze as it happened retreated quickly, assessing for danger before continuing, "Why are they stopping" she screamed, panic evident in her voice.

Ste stroked her cheek, "Calm down sweetie, you need to stay calm" he reassured.

"Brendan's in there" she screamed.

The words seemed to resound all over the street. Firefighters ran forward and continued to fight whilst some geared up and ran in to find him. However, the words fell on Ste's ears hard and he dropped to the floor, "BRENDAN" he screamed into the night and, as he stood to ran forward, he felt someone grab him from behind and pull him into his chest and holding him back.

Tony held Ste hard as he sobbed. He had been waiting off to the side when they had all approached Leah and as soon as he heard the name, he lunged forward, he was not losing Ste, "Let the professionals deal with this" he breathed, "They'll get him out" and, he stroked Ste's head as the blonde haired male sobbed, screaming the name of his love into the chest of his father.

**AN: So like my year, this chapter has been filled with drama but finally, I am in a place to write and update this story with the original plan. I won't promise weekly or daily updates as I have no working laptop but I will try and power them out as often as I can! Sorry this is so short BTW.**


	21. Always Been

**A/N: **Thank you for coming back. The reviews I have received really filled me with a little joy, something I haven't felt for some time over this story. Thank you for reading and coming back. This update is so soon due to finishing work early.

**DISCLAIMER: **I do not own Hollyoaks or any of the characters in this story that are from the show.

Days had passed since the blaze had broken out and every time Ste closed his eyes or was left alone for longer than a few minutes, he could hear, see and feel the flames that had engulfed his future husband.

He would have flashbacks of Brendan's body been carried out of the building, limp and blackened from the smoke. He would feel the pain he felt as Tony tried to hold him back but he broke free and ran to the ambulance just as they were closing the door. He begged them to let him in but the refused, the situation was too serious and they couldn't have someone getting in the way.

He remembered Tony dragging him into a taxi, and he remembered sobbing into Tony's shirt as the taxi drove towards the hospital. He remembered collapsing to his knees as soon as his feet hit the concrete in the drop of zone and could feel Tony's arms wrapped around him as they sat on the ground.

However, nothing compared to how he had felt when he saw Brendan for the first time. He was led into the room by a kind nurse who had prepared him for what he was about to see but, the talk hadn't prepared him at all. The image of it still made him feel sick. He could see Brendan lying there completely motionless. His skin was slightly blackened, his hands bandaged to protect and heal the blisters he flames had caused. The doctor had said he was lucky that only his hands were burnt but Ste didn't feel like this was lucky.

The worse part was Brendan's leg. When the roof had collapsed, the brickwork had landed and trapped his lower limb, meaning that he was not able to get out. The floor had luckily stayed remaining until after he was rescued but a combination of rubble and smoke inhalation had made it impossible for Brendan to leave the burning inferno. The doctor's had explained that there was a possibility that Brendan made still require a 'below the knee' amputation but they were doing everything they could to stop that from happening.

Ste had been relieved to hear that, although Brendan's condition was critical, he was stable. He had been that relieved that, when people had visited, it was the first thing he could say.

After the initial shock of the event and seeing Brendan in his condition, Ste hadn't allowed himself to cry. When people visited, he would inform them of what the doctor had said, let them into to sit with Brendan and run and get drinks from the hospital foyer. When people left, he would just sit and hold Brendan's arm, reliving the day it had happened. At night, he slept on a mattress on the floor next to Brendan's bed, staring up at him and making sure he is still breathing.

It was day five when Tony managed to come and visit. Ste had been sat on his usual chair, staring up at the ceiling and counting the tiles for what felt like the millionth time that week when he heard the door creak open behind him. He turned and it was like a seal snapped inside as he stood and flung himself around Tony, tears pouring down his cheeks. Tony wrapped his arms around the younger man and rested his chin on Ste's head, "Let it all out" he breathed.

Ste continued to sob until he couldn't cry anymore. He pulled away from Tony and gulped, "Sorry about that" he breathed, staring at the floor, "I haven't cried since the day we got here".

Tony nodded, "Been trying to keep brave for Brendan?"

Ste nodded, "That and the people who visit. They want to visit and not have to deal with me blubbering".

"You are allowed to cry", Tony explained, "The man you love is in hospital". He paused for a moment before adding, "So, what have the doctor's said".

Ste moved back to his seat and sat, motioning for Tony to sit in one of the empty chairs. He took a deep breath and leant forward to stroke Brendan's arm, "The doctor said he was critical but stable however, they think he's going to make it" he nodded. He then pointed to Brendan's leg, "They are going to do scans next week to see if the leg will need amputating".

Tony bit his lip and gulped, "I'm really sorry Ste".

Ste shrugged his shoulders, "It doesn't matter does it" he breathed, "One less limb doesn't mean I'll love him less".

Tony let out a small laugh, "I'd be surprised if it did. You two have been mad for each other for over twelve years".

Silence fell over the room, only being interrupted every so often by the beeping of a random machine. Both men were staring at Brendan as his chest softly moved with every breath. It was as they were watching that they noticed the small movement in his face. His lips twitched and his eyes fluttered and Ste would have thought he was dreaming if it wasn't for the small and barely audible whisper, "Ste….phen".

Ste jumped up and moved into Brendan's view, "I'm here Bren" he breathed, "I've always been here". He turned and looked at Tony, "Can you please go and get someone" he almost shouted, wanting Brendan to be able to speak to him more than he was.

**A/N: I'm sorry it was so short! Every time I wanted to write something, I would end up getting distracted or not liking where it was going.**


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